1-900-Hot-Vala
By: Megan
CATEGORY: Humor
WARNINGS: None
AUTHOR’S NOTES: Do silly little conversations pop into your head? Because that happens to me all the time.
"Sam!" Daniel
said, as he sat down across her in the mess hall. "Did you teach Vala about phone sex?"
To her credit, Sam managed to not choke on her blue jell-o
(or worse, shoot it out her nose). "Nice to see you too, Daniel. How were
your meetings in D.C.?"
"They were fine," he replied quickly. "Vala
informed me that she has learned about phone sex and claims she learned it from
you."
"Did this come up while you were in D.C.?" she asked innocently.
Daniel flushed slightly. "Yes," he said, as if the answer should have
been obvious.
"And you're complaining?" Sam asked with a sly smile.
Daniel opened and closed his mouth, unsure how to respond. "Sam," he
finally said, trying to sound sternly.
"Ok, fine. Yes, I did explain the basic concept to her. Happy
now?"
"Why in the world did you do that?"
"Because she asked. She's a grown-up, Daniel. I'm
not going to lie to her. Besides," she said, a smile spreading across her
face. "I thought I was doing you a favor."
Daniel glared in response. "So she just walked up to you and said 'I hear
these Earth communication devices can be used for sex. Please teach me how.' How
did she get the idea in the first place?"
"Well, some of them do vibrate..." she responded, a glint in her eye.
"Sam!"
Sam laughed at her friend's discomfort. "I don't know where she got the
idea, Daniel. Maybe she overheard someone talking. Maybe she saw it on TV.
Maybe she read about it in a magazine. Vala is a
pretty big fan of Cosmo."
"Yeah. And who's fault is that?"
"You were the one who wanted things to occupy her and keep her out of your
lab."
"Fine. But I'm getting you back for this
one."
"Again, I thought you'd be thankful. Did she do it wrong or something?
Last time we talked, she seemed to have a pretty clear grasp of the
concept."
Daniel leaned across the table to whisper to Sam. "Well, maybe I would
have been, except she doesn't understand the concept of timing. I was just
about to walk into a meeting when my phone rang. She didn't even say hello
first!"
Sam began to laugh as Daniel continued. "Jack is never going to let me
live that one down..." He paused. "Wait. Jack told you about this
already, didn't he. You two are just trying to torture
me as much as you can, aren't you."
Sam just shrugged and grinned as she went back to her jell-o.
** The End **
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