Baby Come Back   

                                                                                                                                              By:  spacegypsy1   

 

 

CATEGORY:  General, Humor

WARNINGS:  None

 

AUTHOR’S WEBSITE:

 

  http://www.fanfiction.net/~spacegypsy1 

 

 

CHAPTER 1:  Ah Sweet Mystery of Life

 

Teal’c, Sam and Mitchell sat at the commissary table, their lunch untouched in front of them.

 

“Yeah, he’s mopin’ around but there’s somethin’ else behind those sulking eyes of his. Like a kid with a frog in his pocket, he’s up to somethin’, I can feel it. Landry’s requested a private meeting with me and he’s bein’ cryptic. I’m tellin’ you, there’s somethin’ up.” Pushing the peas around his plate, Mitchell kept lifting his gaze from Sam to Teal’c.

 

“She’s not on base. I checked. Funny thing is no one’s talking or allowing me to use the chip transponder to locate her. I’m locked out…but I’m working on it.” Sam glanced around to be sure no one overheard her.

 

“It is a most strange situation. Hopefully ColonelMitchell will return with more information.”

 

“Yeah, Teal’c, I hope so. I better go. I’ll meet up with you guys later.”

 

                                                       * * * *

Dead silence permeated Sam’s office as she, Teal’c and Daniel shifted their eyes around to each other. Mitchell entered with the strangest look on is face. “What the hell’s goin’ on Jackson?” To which Daniel shrugged his shoulders non-committally.

 

Mitchell slammed his hands on his hips, shaking his head as he moved closer to the other three. “Vala’s left the team.”

 

“What!” Sam jumped up from her seat in shock.

 

“Why would ValaMalDoran leave SG-1?!” Teal’c was unable to subdue his astonishment.

 

Taking a sideways glance towards Daniel, Mitchell cut his eyes back at the other two. “All I got from General Landry was an obscure explanation that Vala was ‘hopefully - temporarily’ on Reynolds team.”

 

“Reynolds? I thought Reynolds had a…dislike for Vala.” Sam settled back into her chair a worried expression on her face.

 

Daniel’s head popped up, “What? That’s crazy. Vala kept their kids when his wife had the last baby. They work well together.”

 

They all looked at him amazed.

 

“I can’t believe she switched teams without a word to any of us.” Mitchell took another questioning look at Daniel. “The orders came through and poof… Vala’s on SG-3.”

 

Teal’c bowed up and went to stand behind Daniel. “DanielJackson, I think you know something you are not sharing with the rest of the team. Please release the information you are attempting to hide. Why did ValaMalDoran leave SG-1? What have you done?”

 

Daniel’s head turned and slowly rose up the length of the foreboding figure towering menacingly over him. With a deep swallow he barely got an answer out. “I…well…” he hedged… “I can’t really say.”

 

Resting his hands on Daniel’s shoulders Teal’c continued a silent threat.

 

With a grin of support to Teal’c, Mitchell moved leaning his hip against the desk, crossed his arms and studied their prey. “I thought you two had something goin’. You’ve been doggin’ her like a love sick puppy for months now and all you’ve got for us is a shrug of your shoulders and an ‘I can’t really say’?”

 

Reaching a hand across the desk, Sam placed it atop Daniel’s, “Did something happen between you that prompted her to switch teams?”

 

Both Mitchell and Teal’c turned a feral eye toward the traitor, but Sam’s quick gleam in their direction gave them the signal - ‘good cop, bad cop’ and they both nodded in acquiesce.

 

Palpably aware of the intimidating twosome, Daniel looked across to Sam. “Yeah, something happened. I can’t talk about it now.”

 

Once again the other three exchanged worried glances. “Come on buddy,” Mitchell pleaded, “give us somethin’. What the hell happened? You two have a knock down drag out fight? What could be so bad that she’d take off like that? Without a word? I could kick her ass from here to Hades!”

 

“It’s because she’s in love with you and you shut her out, right?” Sam squeezed his hand. “I know she is - she told me.”

 

Firmly griping Daniel’s shoulder, Teal’c spoke forebodingly. “Perhaps ValaMalDoran was not able to deal with DanielJackson’s disregard of her.”

 

Finally pushing away from the desk Mitchell groaned, disgusted. “She just up and walked out on you and us in the process! Good job, Jackson, you sure know how to spoil a party!”

 

“It’s not that she’s angry or disillusioned and I didn’t disregard her.” He said in exasperation with an evil glare at the Jaffa, who backed off. “She’s gone…Landry ordered it.”

 

“Oh well, that explains it.” Mitchell threw up his hands in irritation and stalked across the room. He pointed at Jackson shaking his finger but couldn’t think of a thing to say and wandered back with an annoyed, sullen look.

 

The glasses come off and Daniel dropped his head covering his face with his hands. As he started talking, they listened intently at the mumbled words. “I really can’t say. It’s complicated.”

 

“Well this is just great! What the hell is all the mystery about? You have to tell us somethin’. Complicated my ass! What are you hidin’?”

 

“ColonelMitchell says that you have a frog in your pocket, DanielJackson. Is this true?”

 

An intricate series of expressions waved across Daniel’s face. “What?”

 

“It means to hide something that is either surprising or repulsive or both.” Teal’c explained as if speaking to a child.

 

“Possibly.”

 

“Daniel, possibly what?” Sam tried to keep her annoyance in check.

 

“Possibly surprising. Not repulsive.” Taking a thoughtful look at Mitchell he added, “Well not to me anyway.”

 

Now Sam was standing, irritation plainly written on her face. “We’re a team, Daniel. You and I have known each other for over ten years. We share everything. What are you keeping from us? For gods sake we’re a team…A TEAM! You’ve got to tell us something!”

 

Looking around as if expecting to find someone else in the room, Daniel leaned in towards the other three. Each of them moved forward, each looking around for possible intruders. “We…you can’t react to this. You can’t act like you know anything.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Right.”

 

“Indeed. Spill your guts DanielJackson.”

 

“We…we got married.”

 

Complete and utter silence followed for a full minute.

 

Mitchell leaned further in doing an impressive gold fish routine with stuttered uh...uh…uhs. Sam moved back blinking in slow, slow, slow motion, her mouth opening further with each blink and little huh…huh…huhs escaping. Teal’c burst out in deep, loud and uncontrolled laughter.

 

“Holy shit!” Mitchell finally blurted out.

 

“Holy frelling Hannah!” With deer in headlight eyes Sam gaped.

 

Teal’c was doubled over in laughter.

 

Replacing his glasses, Daniel got up and walked out without another word.

 

Like baby ducks following their momma the other three straightened up and - one, two, three - in a row they followed him out.

 

“Whoa there Nellie! Get back here!” Mitchell rushed to catch up. “What do you mean married. What kind of married. Married to...I mean...”

 

Turning on his heels, Daniel stopped dead center of the corridor a scowl on his face. “Will you please keep it down?” He hissed.

 

“Married?” Mitchell whispered harshly.

 

“You and ValaMalDoran are married.” Teal’c was still laughing if just a bit more subdued.

 

“You married Vala. And neither of you said a word.” Sam whispered angrily. “I thought we were friends.”

 

“Look guys. Let’s discuss this off world - later. Please. I promised Landry I’d keep it under my hat until he decided what to do. He said he’d let Mitchell know. I guess he changed his mind.” Daniel left them standing muddleheaded in the deserted hallway.

 

“He is not wearing a hat.” Teal’c just kept laughing.

 

“Oh, real funny big guy.” Mitchell stormed off in one direction.

 

“This is no laughing matter!” Sam stormed off in the other direction.

 

                                                       * * * *

When the four remaining SG-1 members exited the ‘Gate Mitchell was in the middle of the conversation he started as they walked through from SGC. “…and I gotta tell you I’m shocked. You coulda poked me in the eye with a hot iron and I wouldn’ta been more stunned. SG-3. S. G. 3. I can’t believe she’s on SG-3. Now there’s five of them and Reynolds will be kicking our butts.” Sam and Teal’c stood at the foot of the stone steps listening to Mitchell’s tirade as Daniel’s frown got more and more surly. “That’s just crazy Jackson. I thought…I mean…I knew you had a thing…” Stopping suddenly and pivoting around Mitchell went bug eyed. “She’s pregnant! Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Jackson, you’re such a nerd. You didn’t have to marry her!”

 

Daniel’s fist landed somewhere between the tip of Mitchell’s nose and his forehead. Wobbling a minute, the colonel shook his head then wiped a trickle of blood with the back of his hand. “Sorry. Outta line. I guess I deserved that.” Then Mitchell hauled off and decked the archeologist! “And that’s for not tellin’ me!”

 

Daniel was up in half a second and shoved the colonel as his fist reared back for another jab. Teal’c stepped in between the two. He didn’t say a word, he didn’t have to. The two antagonists glared across the Jaffa’s chest at each other. “Perhaps we should get back to the mission and leave this discussion for later.” Teal’c’s proposal was met with a slight nod from the other two men.

 

“Fine!” Mitchell took point and headed out with Teal’c behind him.

 

Sam gestured Daniel ahead and took the six. “You could have said something.” She mumbled at his back.

 

“Taking his side?”

 

“I don’t know. You should have said something. We’re a team. We were a team. What happened? When did things change?”

 

Daniel didn’t answer as they trudged along toward their destination. Things had changed about eight days ago. Or maybe eight months ago. Or two years ago. He really wasn’t sure.

 

 

CHAPTER 2:  Rescue Me

 

“Vala?”

 

She looked up at Reynolds, “Hmm?”

 

“The bets to you. Thirty dollars.” Reynolds pointed to the pile of chips in the middle of the table. He leaned back, looking out towards the kitchen. “Honey, can you bring me a beer?”

 

“No.” Came the reply from the kitchen. “Send one of your guys or gal in here to get it, I’m busy.”

 

Major Warren grinned across at Captain Simon Wells who’d joined SG-3 when he was promoted two days before Vala had been assigned to the team. “I’m out.” Warren tossed his cards into the pile, “I’ll get it.”

 

Vala studied the cards carefully. “Okay, now what beats a flush?”

 

The other team members looked at the three hearts on the table and all chunked their cards in. Vala raked in the chips and buried the club and diamond she had in her hand in the middle of the deck. What a bunch of dolts! I would never have gotten away with that with… Frowning, Vala stopped thinking about her team…her real team. “Deal me out.” She left the table and headed into the kitchen.

 

“Losing?” Lori Reynolds asked.

 

“Hardly. I thought I’d give someone else a chance to win.” Vala leaned against the counter.

 

“Want to talk about it?”

 

“Can’t.”

 

“Well, I’m not military. And I’m curious why you keep fiddling with your left ring finger. I won’t blab to Kevin.”

 

“To who?”

 

“The one you call Reynolds.”

 

“Oh. I didn’t’ even know he had a first name. Daniel and I got married. That’s why they took me off the team. Oh…I wasn’t supposed to say that.” Gawd, I’m going to muck up the whole thing.

 

“Don’t look so worried, Vala. I’ll keep your secret. I take it no one knows.”

 

“No. No one. Just Jack and General Landry and the IOA and the President, me, Daniel and now you. But no one important. That’s the hard part. I miss him so much. And even though we knew this could happen we did it anyway. He just had to tell Jack. Now I wish we hadn’t gotten married.”

 

“Really?” Lori responded sarcastically. “I find that hard to believe. I’ll let you in on a little secret of my own. I was Kevin’s junior officer when I first joined the Air Force. I was reassigned and opted out the first chance I got. I miss it still, but it was worth it. It happens when you work so close to someone and you can’t tempt the fates when you’re in love.”

 

“But I want it all. Neither of us is military. I don’t want to give up SG-1 or Daniel.”

 

Lori handed Vala a glass of wine. “You may not have a choice.”

 

                                                       * * * *

The minute he got the chance, Daniel scurried off into the ancient temple ruins leaving the rest of SG-1 to recon and explore the rest of the deserted city.

 

“What does your doohickey say?” Cam came up behind Sam and squinted at the hand held scanner.

 

“It’s not a doohickey! It’s a remarkable piece of technology, called a hand held scanner!”

 

“Whoa! Sorry. What does your hand held scanner say?”

 

“Nothing.” She snapped.

 

“Fine!” Mitchell stomped off in disgust. “Teal’c you stay with Carter, I’ll check on Jackson.”

 

“It appears things are calming up.” Teal’c’s effort to put a little levity into the situation got him a glare from Sam. “SamanthaCarter, DanielJackson must have a good reason for not telling us of his nuptials. Are you not happy for him?”

 

“I’m going to kill him. I’m going to strip the skin right off his face and shove it down his throat. I’m going to never, ever speak to him again!”

 

Shocked at the rancor in ColonelCarter’s voice Teal’c took a step back. “DanielJackson does not…”

 

“Not him. Jack O’Neill. I’m going to kill Jack O’Neill!”

 

“Ah.” The Jaffa said in understanding.

 

“It’s all his fault. I’ll bet you dollars to donuts he took her off the team! I’ll bet you Daniel told him. I could just ring Daniel’s neck. And Vala’s. And Jack’s!” Sam’s sensor beeped. “Oh boy! Something’s…energy spike…damn!” Sam took off toward the temple with Teal’c close behind her.

 

                                                       * * * *

Cam Mitchell entered the crumbling temple with foreboding. Things just weren’t right. Not with the team, not with the deserted city. Not with anything. Damn Jackson anyway, he shoulda told them. Or at least Landry shoulda said something. Somebody shoulda warned him. He didn’t want Jackson or Vala off the team. The more he thought about it the madder he got! “Jackson?!”

 

“What?!”

 

“Where are you?”

 

“In the temple.”

 

“Well I know that, I’m in the temple, where the hell in the temple are you?”

 

“What difference does it make?”

 

“Look, Daisy Mae, quit bein’ pigheaded.”

 

Daniel stepped back from behind a stone structure, turned the light of his P-90 on Mitchell a moment and then back on the object he was studying.

 

Mitchell approached. “What’s that?”

 

“I’m not sure.” Daniel’s light was trained on a glowing button at the center of the ancient console.

 

Mitchell hesitated a few feet back. “Don’t even think of…”

 

Daniel hit the button.

 

Nothing happened. The two shined their lights all around the room. Both shrugged.

 

“ColonelMitchell?” Teal’c called from just inside the entrance.

 

“Yeah, yeah…I’m comin’.” He turned and walked away. That’s when it happened. The rumble, the screaming blast that knocked him clear across the room and the dead silence that followed.

 

                                                       * * * *

SG-3 was geared up and at the ‘Gate as ordered. Colonel Reynolds turned to Vala as the Stargate dialed. “We still haven’t heard from SG-1. They missed their second check-in and we’re going in for the rescue. Am I going to have trouble with you?”

 

“No sir. I’ve been a host to a Goa’uld. I can certainly handle this. I’m not a panty waist…whatever that is.” Vala opted for the most straightforward thing she could think of. She had something to prove and she would do her duty. No matter what…no matter what she found. No matter what.

 

The other three SG-3 members shuddered and Reynolds nodded. “Good. I knew we could depend on you.” As soon as the Kawoosh settled the five rushed through the ‘Gate.

 

                                                       * * * *

Teal’c and Sam made it to Mitchell who sat stunned and bleeding amidst a pile of rocks.

 

“Son of a bitch! Jackson?!”

 

“What?!”

 

The three P-90 lights swung around and spotlighted the archeologist. He stood swaying, a hand to his head and the hand completely covered in blood.

 

Sam rushed forward. “Are you okay?”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Let me see.” She tried to remove his hand from his head. “Daniel let go and let me see.”

 

“Can’t.”

 

“Can’t let go?”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Why?”

 

He swayed and his eyes seemed to cross.

 

“Teal’c!” Sam called in a panic as Daniel pitched forward. Teal’c arrived just in time to catch him.

 

“You help ColonelMitchell, I will get DanielJackson outside where we can administer first aid.”

 

“I’m fine, Sam, you help with Jackson.” Cam groaned as he managed to get up on shaky legs.

 

Sam and Teal’c helped haul Daniel out into the sunlight where Mitchell waited.

 

Jackson, are you alright?”

 

“Is it dark in the temple?”

 

“Well…yeah. But we’re not in the temple.”

 

“Then I’m not alright. I think I got something in my head.”

 

Teal’c lowered Daniel to the ground and pulled the first aid kit from his pack, while Sam inspected Mitchell’s scrapes and cuts. The static from her radio got Sam’s attention. “Carter.” She responded. Most of what she got back was garbled, but it was definitely Reynolds and he’d said something about having a fix on their position.

 

“Oh. That’s perfect.” Mitchell brushed off Sam’s attempts at first aid. “Rescued by SG-3. What could be worse than that?”

 

“Well, for one, I think I’m blind.” Daniel mumbled and passed out.

 

                                                       * * * *

Sam and Teal’c tried to staunch the blood that flowed freely around the shard of rock that stuck out of the hairline on Daniel’s forehead.

 

When Reynolds team burst into the clearing, both Mitchell and Teal’c raised their weapons quickly and lowered them just as quickly. Reynolds took in the scene. “Vala, you and Wells check the perimeter. Lieutenant, Major, help Colonel Carter.”

 

Vala glanced at Daniel pale and bleeding on the ground and turned away to follow her orders.

 

“How is he?” Reynolds stared at Daniel's head as the archeologist groaned in semi-consciousness.

 

“Not good. We need to get him back as soon as possible.” Sam looked over at Mitchell who nodded.

 

“I’m fine too, thanks for asking, Reynolds.” Mitchell popped his neck and flexed his aching arms. “We can carry him.”

 

“Not necessary. Vala, Wells go back to the ‘Gate and get the stretcher.”

 

“You brought a stretcher?”

 

“It’s on the Med F.R.E.D.”

 

“Med F.R.E.D. Nice.” Mitchell limped over with a worried frown towards Daniel. “You better make it Jackson ‘cause I have every intention of beatin’ the crap out of you.”

 

Reynolds wasn’t the least bit surprised by the apprehensive catch in Mitchell’s voice. What surprised him was that Mitchell apparently meant it.

 

Vala looked nearly as pale as Daniel by the time they got him on the stretcher. Sam patted her shoulder but said nothing. The attempt to acknowledge her while appreciated wasn’t exactly heartwarming. They knew. Daniel must have told them.

 

Mitchell made his way to where Vala stood. “Princess, why don’t you hold on to him to be sure he doesn’t fall off that thing.” His tone didn’t reflect concern for her feelings, not really, nor did it hold a snippet of camaraderie. In fact, ‘Princess’ had come across as more of a slur than his usual endearment.

 

Nodding and unable to speak, Vala took Daniel’s hand as they all moved off towards the Stargate.

 

Reynolds walked beside Mitchell on the six. “Princess, huh?”

 

“Yep.”

 

“We call her Queen…of the Damned!” The two colonels grinned as they followed the stretcher into the blue puddle.

 

 

CHAPTER 3:  Breaking Up is Hard to Do

 

With a deep groan Daniel’s eyes fluttered open squinting against the bright lights of the infirmary. Moaning, he tried to lift a hand to his throbbing head, but one was attached to an IV and the other one was captured in a tight grip.

 

The pin light Dr. Lam shined in his eyes only increases the pain in his head. “What happened?” When the light moved away Daniel tried to bring Vala in focus with a few painful squints before he finally managed to get the three images of her into one. Her head was cocked and she stared blinking back huge tears as she attempted to smile at him.

 

Taking another painful eye strain towards the end of the bed he found the fuzzy figures of Teal’c, Sam and Mitchell. As much as he could make out they all three appeared to be scowling at him as he tried to pull his hand free of Vala’s, who wouldn’t let go.

 

“Why’s everybody staring at me? What happened?” Again he endeavored to pull his hand free.

 

Dr. Lam, checking his monitor, asked softly, “you don’t remember?”

 

“Noooo.” He didn’t have the strength to recapture his hand from Vala’s death grip and he scowled at her again.

 

Mitchell grew closer with a hateful glare, jaw tight and arms crossed before releasing one hand from its locked position to produce Daniel’s glasses.

 

Carolyn snatched the glasses from Mitchell with a fierce look. “He needs rest.”

 

“Whatever you say, you’re the…Doctor.” Mitchell bit out in disgust.

 

“What the hell’s going on?” Daniel looked to Sam who stared at the foot of the bed, brooding. Then he managed a peek at Teal’c who, hands locked behind his back, forced an uncomfortable smile.

 

When he turned back to Vala she leaned over and planted a rather lustful kiss on his lips. Though shocked by her actions he enjoyed it none the less. That in itself was a surprise.

 

“I have to go, darling. We’ve got a recon mission back to the planet.” Letting go of his hand she brushed his cheek and left.

 

Daniel looked at the other three. “What’s going on?”

 

“I got paperwork to do.” Mitchell, arms crossed once again, was looking at the floor.

 

“I’ve got to study the readings from the sensor.” Sam still had her eyes down cast.

 

Teal’c remained silent.

 

“I thought you guys were going on recon.” Eyes closed, Daniel fought to clear the fog in his brain.

 

Heads turning back and forth in confusion, the other three remained quiet for a full minute trying to figure out what he was talking about.

 

Finally Mitchell responded. “That’s SG-3.”

 

“Glad you’re alright, Daniel.” Sam patted his foot at the end of the bed but she didn’t sound very sympathetic.

 

Daniel refrained from shaking his head to clear the cobwebs and opened his eyes to find Teal’c looming over him. “Teal’c what’s going on?”

 

Teal’c looked at the doctor who shook her head and told her patient, “Daniel you need to rest; they can answer your questions later.”

 

“I have work to do; somebody else can answer his questions!” Mitchell snapped out the words quickly.

 

Carolyn Lam came around the bed and confronted Mitchell with a heated glare. “Why don’t you just go do your paperwork and leave my patient in peace? I know I’d be happy to see you go. You’ve been released – as in get the hell out of my infirmary!”

 

“Lady, I’d be more than happy to, seein’ as this is my least favorite place on planet Earth!” Angrily, Mitchell left nodding to Jack who entered.

 

“How’s the patient?”

 

“Jack? Thank God you’re here; please tell me what the hell is going on.” Daniel’s hand grabbed his aching head.

 

The blurry figure of Sam at the foot of the bed suddenly turned and stormed out and Jack turned, following her out without another word.

 

Again, Daniel’s eyes shut leaving him unaware that Carolyn injected something into the IV drip. With a deep sigh he started drifting off still confused but feeling much, much better.

 

“DoctorLam, does DanielJackson not remember he blew up the temple on PR3-389?”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

“That ValaMalDoran was assigned to SG-3?”

 

“Probably not, hopefully it’s just short term memory loss.”

 

“That they are married?”

 

“What!? Who’s married?”

 

“I should leave.”

 

Daniel’s last conscious thought was an echo of the doctor’s words…who’s married?

 

                                                       * * * *

Jack caught up with Sam halfway down the hallway. “Hey? Wait.” His hand gently grasped her arm which she snatched free. “Carter, I know you’re upset about Daniel, but he’s going to be fine.”

 

“Yes, hopefully he’ll be fine, and yes, I’m upset as I would be about anyone being injured. Now please leave me alone…SIR!”

 

“What’s with the seventh grader attitude? I don’t get it.”

 

The look she shot at him could have melted the ice in Antarctica. “Of course you don’t, you’re up there in your ivory tower – having forgotten what’s it’s like! Don’t talk to me.” She stormed off in a huff.

 

“Colonel!” Jack bellowed in his best command voice.

 

Doing a precision military turn and standing at attention she answered in her best subordinate voice. “Yes sir?”

 

“Carter, we need to talk about this…situation.”

 

“With all due respect, a tad late to be discussing it now isn’t it sir?” She started walking again, dismissing him out of hand.

 

“Hold up a minute.” Jack tried to keep his voice from showing the irritation he felt.

 

Sam stopped without turning around. “I don’t think this is the place to discuss it, sir. Maybe we can schedule a meeting for later.” Again she walked off.

 

“All right, Colonel. Let’s have that meeting. Right now. Your office. And that, Colonel Carter, is an order.”

 

Stopping, her back went rigid and she turned to him but her response was cut off by General Landry’s announcement over the intercom. “SG-1 report to the briefing room immediately.”

 

                                                       * * * *

Woolsey sat in the chair to the right of General Landry, Jack to the left. Mitchell sulked beside Woolsey, Teal’c next to Jack and Sam opted of a chair further down the table away from everyone.

 

Woolsey looked over to Cam Mitchell. “Once Dr. Jackson has recovered you can have him or Vala Mal Doran, take your pick.”

 

“How ‘bout Dr. Balinsky?”

 

“I beg your pardon? Colonel what are you saying?” General Landry eyed Mitchell with dismay.

 

Cam, don’t you think that’s throwing the baby out with the bathwater?” Sam didn’t bother to look up from the paper she was doodling on.

 

“What baby?” Teal’c asked perplexed.

 

Cam ignored Teal’c and slunk down in the chair, and tightened his ever present crossed arms. “Precisely!”

 

Landry spoke at the same time as Mitchell, “We’re putting Vala back on SG-1 while Dr. Jackson is still on medical lea…”

 

“I’d prefer someone else,” the colonel shot back without waiting for Landry to finish.

 

“That’s not going to happen. How did you find out?”

 

“Find out what sir?”

 

“You’re trying my patience, son.”

 

“Vala Mal Doran,” Woolsey accused.

 

“DanielJackson,” Teal’c corrected.

 

“Dr. Jackson?” Woolsey looked around in surprise.

 

Sam kept doodling, “Yes, he…”

 

“With all due respect, sir, I don’t like bein’ kept in the dark about my…”

 

The General interrupted Mitchell, “It was a mutual decision between General O’Neill and myself…”

 

Sam glared up at Jack for an instant and went back to drawing daggers and mathematical equations on her paper.

 

“I believe Colonel Mitchell may be on to something here. Both of them should be disciplined.” Woolsey began to write notes and Mitchell sat up suddenly.

 

“Disciplined? No one said anything about disciplined. I’m talkin’ about…”

 

“I’m not comfortable with your attitude Woolsey…” Landry leaned threateningly towards the man.

 

Throwing her pen down Sam glared at Jack again. “This is totally out of hand…”

 

“I believe that ColonelCarter is right…”

 

“Will you all please shut up?!” Jack stood suddenly, “Daniel and Vala will be returning to SG-1 as soon as possible. That’s MY final decision. Vala’s proven she can handle it and Daniel…well Daniel is Daniel. We’re not breaking up a perfectly good team! They’re both going to be fine.”

 

                                                       * * * *

Still geared up from her scrubbed mission, Vala came into the infirmary delighted to see Daniel sitting up.

 

“You’re back already?” His smile was welcoming if a little lopsided from the black and blue swelling on the left side of his face.

 

“Apparently I got bumped off of SG-3 at the last minute.” She kissed the side of his mouth and he marveled at the casual intimate gesture as though she thought it an everyday occurrence to be kissing him.

 

“You left SG-1? When did that happen?”

 

Vala pushed his hip to scoot him over and hopped up on the bed, swinging her legs off the side and head turned towards him. “When you opened your big mouth and told Jack.”

 

“Told Jack what?”

 

“That we got married.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“Married. You know that little sacred event two weeks ago?”

 

“Vala, please stop playing around. I’m confused enough as it is.”

 

“Daniel, you really don’t remember? We left your house the morning after…we…you know and got married darling, then things just started falling apart. I told you not to tell him, but no, you insisted. Then they took me off SG-1 and we’ve been apart ever since. It’s killing me. I miss you.”

 

She did it again, that casual kissing thing that sent shock waves right down to his toes. He took hold of what senses he had left. “Why would I marry you? Come up with a better story, Vala.” He grinned at her antics; she was such a comedian sometimes.

 

“You really don’t remember?” There was a glint of fear in her eyes and Daniel noted it in uncertainty.

 

“I’d remember something like that…that’s just crazy. Stop with the foolish chatter and tell me what’s going on. We wouldn’t even consider marriage and you know it. We’re not even…you know…whatever.” His headache was back and he squeezed his head.

 

Vala jumped off the bed and looked at him. “Oh we positively ‘whatevered’. Are you saying you want a divorce?” Her hands slammed on her hips, her lips pouted and she glared angrily.

 

“Divorce?! Come on Vala, you’ve got to be kidding me. IF we were married yes I’d want a divorce considering that you and I don’t actually see eye to eye in the first place. Friends don’t marry friends. Cut out the silliness, my head is… Hey, where are you going?”

 

She turned from the doorway, “Well Daniel, I’m going to research divorce customs on the internet as well as to see if divorced couples can be on the same team.”

 

“You’re nuts! Stop messing with me! Vala, come back here! What the hell has gotten into everyone?” He was talking to an empty room. “Can someone PLEASE tell me what’s going on?”

 

 

CHAPTER 4:  Friends in Low Places

 

Daniel sat on the side of the bed in his quarters stunned, more so than if he’d been struck by a zat and undoubtedly he could not be more stunned by anything else that might come along. Nope. He was the epitome of textbook stunned. Jack had explained – in glowing detail – the events of the past few weeks. Events Daniel did not remember. He had married Vala. Had told Jack his true feelings – which Jack gladly expounded on. “You said, Daniel and I quote, ‘I’m crazy in love with her and I’m ready to settle down. Start a family. Live happily ever after. We got married today’ that’s it – that’s what you said.”

 

There was more to this situation, Daniel mused, Vala had been reassigned to SG-3 when Jack found out, Mitchell and Sam and maybe even Teal’c were furious with him for not telling them – that part he figured out for himself. He was too tired to think about it and his head had started pounding again. He’d get some sleep - maybe tomorrow would be better.

 

The door flew open and Vala rushed in hands waving wildly, “You’ll be glad to know that divorce is not necessary. We can have the marriage annulled. It appears that since there was no consummation of the vows after the ceremony, divorce is not necessary. Apparently consummation prior to the vows doesn’t count, however the legal completion of a marriage by an act of sexual intercourse between the spouses is required.” She spit it all out without a hint of regret as if reciting directly from some internet site. Finally taking a breath she added, “I emailed you the link. I ordered the paper work. We can officially be back to being friends. No consummating activities are allowed in the interim, which of course won’t be a problem, well at least not for you. We’ll both be back on SG-1. Oh! Glad to see you’re better, I was really worried about you, Daniel. Well. This ordeal will be over with soon. Let’s just pretend it didn’t happen. You want some Jell-o? …ah, I see you already got some. My god Daniel, you shouldn’t sit around like that, in your boxers and nothing else. That’s just not fair! Goodnight.”

 

Daniel looked down at his state of undress and shook his head. Apparently he could be more stunned. Maybe she hadn’t wanted to be married. Maybe they had both been drunk. He slipped under the covers and propped his hands behind his head. Ordeal? No consummating activities? Pretend it never happened? Sitting around in boxers is unfair? What difference could it possibly make now? She’d obviously seen it all before. His head began to pound even harder and his left eye was twitching. He was in love with Vala Mal Doran…Jackson. He’d realized that well over three weeks ago and obviously had acted on it within the past three weeks. But suddenly, it seemed, the universe was conspiring to keep them apart. Moving his right arm across his eyes he groaned. Now what the hell am I supposed to do? Friends. She wants to be friends?

 

                                                       * * * *

Vala, eyes puffy from crying and lack of sleep, was over the top chipper at breakfast with Sam, Teal’c and Cam the next morning. “Did you miss me?” She sat down and grinned idiotically at the other three.

 

“I did.” Teal’c bowed with a slim smile.

 

“And you Samantha? Did you miss me too?” Vala slathered raspberry jelly on her toast and took a huge bite.

 

“I did…actually.”

 

“Cameron?”

 

“No comment.”

 

“It wasn’t my fault Cameron, I wanted to keep it all a secret but Daniel insisted we needed to tell Jack. It’s all Jack’s fault. Besides we’re not really married.”

 

“WHAT!?” Mitchell jumped up knocking his chair over. The entire commissary quieted and everyone was staring.

 

Vala paled and ducked her head pushing her scrambled eggs around her plate. “I mean we did have a wedding but since we never…consummated the marriage – not afterwards anyway - we aren’t really married and we’re having the whole thing annulled. Happy?” She let go of the fork and it rattled against her plate. Looking up she tried to act as if it was no big deal but she could feel the stinging behind her eyes. “I have to go. I left something with Reynolds and I have to go and get it.” She dashed out.

 

Dumbstruck, Mitchell picked up the chair and sat. “What? The whole thing was a scam? Meant to torture me? Test my leadership skills? I’m gonna kill me a General and happily face the firin’ squad. Had a wedding but they’re not married…I don’t think I understand. This whole ‘thing’ just keeps gettin’ weirder.”

 

“ValaMalDoran appears to have been crying, again. I believe ColonelsMitchell and Carter that she is unhappy with the thought of annulment. Perhaps it is time we put aside our misguided annoyance and help to resolve this ‘thing’.”

 

“Right! I noticed the eyes, damn I feel like a jerk. It was never about Daniel and Vala. I shoulda been mad at the bureaucracy in the first place.” Now Mitchell was really sulking. “We were a team and I as much as anybody screwed with the team. Maybe more. We shoulda stuck by them.” He kicked the table leg angry with himself.

 

“Indeed, ColonelMitchell. You may have contributed to ending their marriage.”

 

Teal’c’s accusation hit Mitchell like a freight train. He’d worked months to bring this team together and now – in a few days – he’d managed to shake the foundation. “So what are we gonna do?”

 

“I’ve got an idea.” Sam grinned and the three of them moved closer and began to whisper.

 

 

                                                       * * * *

Vala perched herself on a stool in Sam’s lab and stared at the blank computer screen; she refused to cry. She’d been a fool to let her guard down where Daniel was concerned. She should have known better than to let herself feel happy. Somehow it always gets spoiled. But she couldn’t deny that she was miserable with the fact that her short venture into marriage with Daniel had to come to an end. Obviously she wasn’t cut out for marriage.

 

Sam entered, followed by Teal’c and Mitchell and Vala looked up with a bright faked smile.

 

“Find what you needed?” Sam went straight to her equation board.

 

Brows crinkling in confusion Vala didn’t answer.

 

“The thing you left with Reynolds?” Mitchell offered in explanation.

 

“Oh! That. Yes, ahm…my pen. My favorite pen.” Lifting one of the economy pack Bic pens from the desk, Vala held it up waving it around in the air.

 

“Vaaalaaa?” Sam asked.

 

“Yeeesss?”

 

“You’re not really wanting to end your marriage to Daniel, are you? Be honest.”

 

Ducking her head Vala answered. “Noooo.”

 

“Ah! Good! Okay, guys. Here’s the plan.” Sam started writing on the equation board in magenta color. PLAN underlined three times. She picked up the green marker and wrote: VALA-SAM-TEAL’C-CAM. Then she drew lines down in a column.

 

Everyone else pulled their chairs up like school children and watched carefully. “Where’s Daniel?” Vala asked quietly.

 

“Oh, right…” Sam picked up the eraser and obliterated the word PLAN, then neatly printed: DANIEL’S CAPITULATION TO MARRIAGE and underlined it four times.

 

Vala grinned, leaned over and hugged Mitchell’s arm. “Oh how wonderful. You’ve decided to help? Really. That’s…well…that’s just wonderful. But I meant where Daniel is physically?”

 

“DoctorLam has given DanielJackson a stronger pain reliever. He is asleep in his quarters. I delivered the medication myself and made sure he took them.”

 

“Teal’c! You drugged him?!” Sam turned from the board astonished.

 

With a slight bow he reported, “I did.”

 

“Good job, buddy.” Mitchell patted the Jaffa on the shoulder. “Go on with class Miss Samantha.”

 

Using a red marker Sam wrote under Vala’s name: Under no circumstances will give in to any...she paused a long time in writing...

 

“What?”

 

“Any what?”

 

“Come on Sam, any what?”

 

Sam wrote again…any advances from the target subject should they be presented.

 

“You need another column.” They all turned towards the doorway to find Jack waving.

 

“O’Neill, you wish to participate in ColonelCarter’s plan to entrap DanielJackson?”

 

“Yeah. If I don’t turn to stone from Carter’s glares.”

 

“Pull up a chair General. We can use all the help we can get.” Sam didn’t smile until she turned back around to the board.

 

She continued in red under Vala. WILL however use all known tactics of…again she paused.

 

“Of, ahm…of…” Mitchell scrunched up his face in thought.

 

Vala twirled a pigtail and stared at the board.

 

Teal’c raised an eyebrow and contemplated.

 

“Of seduction.” Jack offered and Sam wrote it on the board. Settling in a chair beside Vala Jack grinned and studied Sam’s six.

After adding GEN J.O. in green to the board beside their names next came the blue marker.

 

“Ah, wait a minute there Carter. Make that Jack if you don’t mind.”

 

Popping the top from the green marker she used her fist to erase the GEN J.O. and replaced it with JACK.

 

“There. Now Cam, what can you do?” She twirled the blue marker in her fingers.

 

“Hmm. Let’s see. Well first I can apologize…”

 

“Oh no. Let’s keep him on edge.” Sam turned and caught Jack staring at her backside.

 

“Okay, then I’ll badger him with questions…”

 

She wrote questions in blue under Cam’s name. “Like?”

 

Mitchell, Teal’c and Vala sighed and looked at the ceiling for the answer. Mitchell scratched his head, Vala bit at her lip and Teal’c just stared.

 

“Like why, why, why in a million, million years would he marry Vala.” Jack offered his suggestion.

 

“Perfect!” Sam listed the why’s and the million’s on the board followed by marry Vala?

 

Sam replaced the blue marker with pink. “Now me. I’ll work on his emotions: Emotions. And get him to talk about his feelings: Feelings. And use the term wife: WIFE.

 

Vala drew a deep audible breath and tears filled her eyes.

 

“Hey, Princess, it’s gonna be alright. We’re sorry we screwed this up, but we’re all here for you now.” Cam placed an arm around Vala’s shoulder.

 

“I’ll be fine. Go on Samantha.” Wiping at her tears she smiled. God, she really loved her team and Jack. They were real friends and if anyone could straighten out the memory losing archeologist it was these guys.

 

This time Sam pulled out the extra large black marker. “Teal’c?”

 

“I believe, SamanthaCarter, that it would be prudent for me to ensure that DanielJackson is never allowed to be alone with ValaMalDoranJackson. He can be quite the trickster even with his memory not fully intact.”

 

ENSURE SUBJECT NEVER ALONE WITH WIFE.

 

Sam rooted around in her box of colored markers and pulled out the purple one. “And you, Sir?”

 

Jack stood and approached the board taking the purple marker from Sam. Constantly remind subject of all (underline, underline) reasons subject reported prior to the subjects – YET AGAIN (capitol letters) – memory loss. I’ve (underline, underline) got the inside info (exclamation point, exclamation point)

 

“O’Neill would you please share your inside information?”

 

“Sure T.” And Jack uncapped a marker and began drawing a telephone, stick people – one with a bow tie and one with a veil – and gave a play by play account of all he knew.

 

“Alright class, you have your assignments. We begin the assault tomorrow sharply at 0500.”

 

 

CHAPTER 5:  Tired of Being Alone

 

“DanielJackson are you ready for breakfast?” Teal’c loomed over the subject.

 

Batting his eyelids against the glare of the overhead light Daniel looked up in surprise. “I just woke up, what time is it?”

 

“It is time for breakfast. Dr.Lam insists you get back into routine to help with your memory loss.”

 

Sitting up, Daniel rubbed his face, yawned and grabbed his head. “Oh, god, I feel like I’ve been on a Jack O’Neill three day drunk...”

 

“Indeed.” Teal’c produced Daniel’s glasses, holding them out towards the wobbling archeologist.

 

Placing an elbow to his knee and his head in his hand Daniel held the other one out for his glasses. “…or I’ve been drugged.”

 

“There is coffee in the commissary. Please get dressed, I will wait.”

 

A few steps down the hall Teal’c stopped, hands behind his back and head down, looking at the subject’s feet. “DanielJackson I believe shoes are a requirement on base.”

 

“Oh yeah. Sorry.” Yawning Daniel returned to his quarters and Teal’c waited patiently…for five minutes. Returning to the door, not the least bit concerned it might be locked, he entered. Teal’c had earlier glared at the guard down the hall and politely asked to borrow the man’s access security card.

 

“DanielJackson!”

 

Daniel was face down sideways across the bed, asleep. “What?” He mumbled, head buried into the rumbled covers.

 

Taking a hold of the back of his jacket, Teal’c hauled him up. “We are late for breakfast.”

 

Once again on their way Teal’c stopped and handed the card back to the guard with a bow, a smile and a sincere thank you. The guard only gaped at the Jaffa and nodded.

 

                                                       * * * *

In the commissary, Teal’c guided their subject to the end of the table and practically shoved him into the chair that faced the door.

 

Slumping down, Daniel put his head on the table. “I need coffee.” He raised his head just enough to see the others. Sam, who just took a bite from her plate of fruit, nodded with a wan smile.

 

“I forgot to get it.” His head went back to his arms on the table.

 

Mitchell, stabbing a forkful of scrambled eggs, quipped. “Yeah you seem to be conveniently forgetting a lot lately.”

 

Properly chastised, Daniel went for coffee. Just as he settled back in his chair, Vala came through the doorway. Her hair was down, curled and shining with a tiny tiara perched in the center. The coffee cup stopped right at chin level and Daniel stared in awe. She had on a black lacy camisole that stopped mid belly and looked more suited to underwear then outerwear, low rider - obviously altered – black BDU pants. When she stopped beside him to sing song ‘good morning’ her tantalizing taut tummy was at his eye level and he swallowed and closed his eyes for a moment to regain his composure. He wished he’d kept them closed.

 

Vala snatched a strawberry from Sam’s plate and sucked it into her mouth, moaning in pleasure. “Umm, yummy.” With a slight raise of her shoulders and a lick of her lips she sauntered off towards the food line, hips swaying gently.

 

                                                       * * * *

Okay, think straight. You have to admit that you love her. As strange as that is. And, well, obviously something happened. Something I wish to hell I could remember. Daniel shook his head in befuddlement.

 

“Daniel.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Please hold your head still unless you want your CAT scan to come out with scrambled brains.”

 

The machine whirled around his head. “Sorry.” He lay still trying to force the memories. Closing his eyes produced a vague shadow…a thought from weeks ago. ‘I’m tired of being alone, tired of resisting what I want’ then flashes of himself at dinner with Vala. He shook his head again.

 

“Daniel! We’re never going to finish here if you don’t stay still!” Carolyn’s irritation was colored with humor.

 

“Sorry.”

 

“Yes, you said that before. I have to start the last two series again. Just hold still, relax, and think of something pleasant.”

 

Something pleasant. Something…

 

The memory floated around coalescing into a dream. So thrilled by his invitation to dinner, Vala was the personification of bouncing off the walls. “Where are we going?” “I thought we’d grill steaks on my balcony.” “Oh, wonderful, what should I wear?” “Something casual…and modest.” “Well, darling, that will be challenge. What time?” “We’ll leave about six.” “I’ll be ready.”

 

He’d been surprised by her modest light blue skirt and white T-shirt attire. The fit and length of her skirt was accentuated when she leaned over the balcony to peer below, presenting him with a delightful view of her nice backside. Dinner had been enjoyable, at least until she spilled red wine down her front. Laughing they’d both grabbed napkins and started wiping at her, him on the top, her on the bottom, making it worse. His laughter had died out when he realized what he was doing. Rubbing the cloth across her breast in slow precise motions. “You can...ah…” He’d pointed towards his bedroom. “Ah…find something in there. We’ll run them through the washer…ahm…before they stain.” “Yes.” Vala held a look of bewilderment without a trace of guile and she’d nodded and gone off into his bedroom.

 

Waiting on the balcony, his mind running rampant with thoughts of Vala undressing, he’d stared at the sky and fought the urge to join her. The thought did not disgust him and he grinned. A deep longing sigh only made his grin escalate. No longer caring how she felt about him, no longer fighting the attraction, no longer denying his feelings he let go of everything he’d built up since that kiss so long ago on the Prometheus. Love had fought its way into his heart and he had enough battles to fight without that one. If the last ten years had taught him anything – it was how to survive in the face of unparalleled pain. If the opportunity to act on the temptation presented itself he would take it.

 

“Daniel?” Her voice had called to him from the bedroom and he almost changed his mind.

 

“Hmm?” Forcing himself up he wandered towards her.

 

“How do you start this thing?”

 

Heading for the alcove where the washer and dryer were he mentally prepared himself for what he might find.

 

She’d turned on the radio and was dancing around in front of the washer barefoot and dressed in one of his shirts. Her white wine stained bra dangled from one finger and he did not want to speculate on where the panties were. The instant his eyes lit on her he knew. He was going to make love to Vala Mal Doran.

 

“Daniel?”

 

The memory faded instantly. “Yeah?”

 

“All done. Did you fall asleep?” Carolyn was standing beside the CAT smiling at him.

 

“Yeah, I guess.” Pushing up he sat on the side of the machine and rubbed his head.

 

“Still having headaches?” Dr. Lam had replaced his friend Carolyn and looked at him in concern.

 

“Not from the injury.”

 

Taking the pin light from her pocket she examined each pupil. “Looks good.”

 

“I’m fine Carolyn and ready to return to full duty.”

 

Placing the light back in her pocket she eyed him speculatively, “We’ll see after the scan results. I still want you to take it easy. Not too much reading either. Understand?”

 

He grinned up at her and nodded.

 

                                                       * * * *

Teal’c had been following him like a shadow recently so Daniel wasn’t surprised to find him waiting outside the infirmary.

 

“How was your exam?”

 

“Teal’c you need to stop worrying about me. I’m fine, really.”

 

A slight raise of a brow answered. “Would you care for lunch today with the team? We have found a new establishment.”

 

“You mean we’re not going to ‘Red Hot & Blue Memphis Pit Bar-B-Que’? Mitchell will be disappointed.”

 

“We are going to ‘Oma’s Haus’. German food.”

 

“What!? Oma’s?”

 

“Yes, Colonel Mitchell thought you might enjoy that.”

 

“Mitchell? As in ‘Jackson, I’m gonna beat the crap out of you’ Mitchell?”

 

“The very one. Are you not curious about the restaurant?”

 

“More hungry than curious. I’ll get Vala, she can ride with me.”

 

“Your wife has gone ahead with ColonelsCarter and Mitchell. O’Neill will be driving us as Dr.Lam has indicated you are not to operate a vehicle until released to do so.”

 

My wife? “Whatever.” Daniel said with a disgusted sigh. He feared he’d never find a moment alone with Vala.

 

                                                       * * * *

The next few days were taxing, not a one of them left him in peace. Jack was coming and going from Washington like going through one of those revolving doors, Sam spent hours on end trying to glean every fiber of his emotional state, Mitchell questioned him like a high powered lawyer, Vala was suspiciously absent from the scene unless the four of them were all present. Teal’c remained his constant shadow. And still he felt lonely without Vala’s constant chatter. The memories were stubbornly caught somewhere in his head sending out occasional flickers of Vala naked in his arms. Mere seconds of a vision that would stop him cold and produce a sheen of sweat at the same time. And there was something about the way she acted when she was around him. Sultry and flirtatious, yes, but there was a deeper closeness involved. But when she spoke to him in a quiet intimate voice it was only to share ‘annulment’ rhetoric.

 

He couldn’t get a moment alone with his… ‘wife’ as they all made a point to call her. And suddenly he realized they were doing it on purpose. All of them!

 

It wasn’t much past 0600 hours and his head pounded incessantly. Putting on a T-shirt and a pair of jeans he headed out the door. He couldn’t have been more than ten feet from her door when his shadow rounded the corner. How the hell is he doing it? Did they have a GPS tracking him?

 

“Look Teal’c I need a moment alone with Vala.”

 

“She is not here. She is spending the weekend with ColonelCarter.”

 

“Of course she is!”

 

 

 

CHAPTER 6:  All Together Now

 

Late Sunday afternoon Jack’s hand came to rest on Daniel’s shoulder as he caught up with him in the hallway.

 

“What are you still doing here...again?” Daniel felt exhausted and in no mood for Jack.

 

“Why do you ask me that every time I come for a visit?”

 

“Why do you always hang around? Don’t answer that, I know. You’re up to something.”

 

“I’m worried about you, Daniel, you and your brain that keeps getting wiped out. I’m here to help you remember the past three weeks.”

 

Entering his office Daniel moved away from Jack and sat at his desk. “Sure you are. No need to stay. I have work to do.”

 

Fiddling with the newest artifact on Daniel’s desk Jack hummed a little tune. “Ya know, you kept say things like ‘she completes me’, ‘I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it.’, hmmm, I need to remember that one, it might be my ticket out of the dog house. Anyway, there’s more, you were in linguistic mode and went on and on. It was amazing. I never knew you’d fall so fast, although you did say it’d been coming on a while.”

 

“Those are movie quotes, Jack. I don’t watch movies, I’d never say that.”

 

“Then how do you know they’re movie quotes?”

 

“Because the first one had been bantered around for months and there’s no way I would have come up with the second one…I’m a linguist not a poet. I never said them.”

 

“I swear Daniel, you told me that…or something like that. You were all gushy talking when you called me. You’re in love, Danny-boy and love does strange things to a man.”

 

“Jack, go home.” Daniel snatched the artifact away from his friend.

 

“So you really don’t remember calling me? Telling me you were getting married? Asking my advice? Telling me all the flowery things?”

 

Staring up at Jack, Daniel furrowed his brows. “I might have a vague recollection of talking to you.”

 

“That’s good!” Jack picked up the artifact again.

 

Daniel took the object from Jack and placed it in a drawer. “What I remember was after the fact and I didn’t ask any advice, nor did I get all…flowery.”

 

“So you do remember the wedding?”

 

“No.”

 

“But you remember the phone call?”

 

“Maybe.”

 

Jack wandered around the room inspecting all the doodads and riffling through parchment. “You don’t love her…at all?”

 

Not a peep came out of the archeologist who started scribbling in his journal.

 

“Okay, I’m going. I’ll be back later.” Leaving Daniel alone to contemplate his ‘memories’ Jack strolled out with a grin on his face and a nod to Sam who waited outside.

 

Needing to talk to Vala, Daniel left his work hoping to find her this time when Sam appeared in his doorway.

 

“I thought we might talk a bit Daniel.” Sam walked right past him into his office and took a seat.

 

“I was just heading out.” Still standing at the door, Daniel pointed into the corridor but Sam just smiled at him sweetly. They’re taking turns!

 

“Look, Sam,” Daniel began from the doorway. “Everything’s fine. I understand your…reaction and all. Let’s put it behind us.”

 

“Pfft, that!” Waving a hand dismissively Sam got more comfortable in the chair. “We’ve been friend’s way too long to worry about a little tiff. I want to be here for you. I know you, your emotions must be all helter skelter. Come on Daniel, have a seat and let’s talk.”

 

His head dropped and his hands went deep into his pockets as he shuffled his feet then returned to his desk. Hands still in his pockets he sat down and waited. Somehow he had to end this insanity. This has got to stop.

 

“You must be feeling something. I mean the past few years with Vala have been a wild roller coaster ride for you. It’s been a long time since you’ve had a wife to think about. We all know how Vala is…was, but you must have had some feelings for her to marry her in the first place. You’ve been an emotional wreck; she’s been an emotional wreck. You two just seemed perfect for one another...”

 

There was more, but Daniel tuned her out as the word ‘wife’ kept looping around in his over taxed brain.

 

“Daniel, are you listening?”

 

“Oh yeah, go on.” And she did, on and on and on about feelings, emotions and his wife. Any minute now he expected her to start doing mathematical equations in explanation of his feelings. Charting his emotions in astrophysical terms on some board with colored markers. Creating a naquadah powered flashing sign that blinked ‘wife’ like a scientific mantra all over the base.

 

“Anyway, I know you need to talk it out so I’ll come back later.” She was standing patting his shoulder.

 

“Ah, okay, sure.” As she left he was tempted to rattle his head around to clear the debris but he was afraid it would give him a worse headache. With a sigh of relief, Daniel stood and headed out the door again, where, of course he found Teal’c waiting.

 

“I really have something to do, Teal’c. Can we talk later?” Walking past the smiling Jaffa Daniel moved along in fear the man would stop him for more of this craziness.

 

Teal’c caught up and walked along beside him without a word. They turned the corner side by side and Daniel bumped headlong into Mitchell.

 

“Whoa! Hey Jackson, we need to talk.” The colonel grabbed Daniel’s jacket lapel and pulled him along back towards the office. Practically dumping the Doctor of Archeology into his chair Mitchell propped a hip on the desk and folded his arms. “I’m really pissed, but I gotta ask ya, why in a million, million years would you marry Vala Mal Doran? Ah, I mean Jackson? Your wife? The one you married without so much as a hidey ho to anyone. What the hell were you thinkin’? How would you feel if I up and married Lam? Or Sam? Or Cassie? Or some funky Tok’ra chick? Then didn’t tell anybody? Think I was crazy wouldn’t you? Why’d you do it? You must have known it’d be death to SG-1; man don’t you give a rat’s ass about the team? What where you thinkin’? A wife?! Yeah, that’s just what we need. You got the IOA coming down on us like a bag of hammers. I got questions and I need answers.” Mitchell checked his watch. “I gotta meeting with the IOA, gotta go. We’ll talk later.” Mitchell was whistling a happy tune when he left.

 

Daniel laid his head back against the chair with a defeated sigh. He had to talk to Vala, had to figure this whole thing out. He remembered two things. Maybe not in detail but he knew he’d made love to Vala the night before the forgotten wedding and that he was in love with her. He cautiously approached the door and peeped into the hall. Good. No one was around. By the time he turned the first corner he felt confident that he was free at last. They couldn’t keep this up forever. Siler smiled at him as he approached. “Hey, Doc, General O’Neill wanted me to tell you he’s gone to O’Malley’s if you wanted to talk. Said he’d be expecting you.”

 

“Thanks.” Daniel felt better the further he got. Good. Jack’s gone, at least for a while.

 

“Hey Dr. Jackson.” Bill Lee came out of his lab into the corridor. “Ah, Teal’c said to tell you he’d be in the gym if you needed him.”

 

“Ah, thanks.” Three down, with Mitchell in the IOA meeting. Stepping up the pace Daniel made for Sam’s lab where Vala should be. The lab was deserted and he headed for the commissary.

 

“Dr. Jackson, I was just coming to find you.” Walter was clearing his lunch tray, “Colonel Carter said to tell you she’d probably talk to you tonight. She’s gone out for the rest of the afternoon.”

 

“Great! Ah, I mean, okay, thanks Chief.” Daniel was elated. One place left to look. He headed off for Vala’s quarters. As he approached Vala’s door, General Landry came around the corner.

 

“She’s not there, son. She and Woolsey went out for cocktails. Imagine that.” Landry grinned and kept on down the hall.

 

Daniel’s head dropped and he stared at the polish floor, fascinated by the turn of events.

 

 

CHAPTER 7:  At Last

 

Trying to ignore the tapping on her door Vala rolled to her back and let out a sigh of resignation.

 

“Vala?” His voice was like a bullet through the heart. She wasn’t expecting him! Jumping up too quickly she tangled her foot in the covers and landed flat on her face on the floor.

 

“Vala? Are you alright?”

 

Where was Muscles? He was supposed to be watching Daniel. Resting her forehead on the rug she yelled back. “Fine, just moving some things around, redecorating. Go away.”

 

“I wanted to talk to you, preferably not through the door.”

 

“Try email.” Turning her face she put a cheek on the floor and closed her eyes. The tapping stopped. Damn, this was harder than she thought. Pushing herself up, Vala removed one boot and threw it against the door in frustration.

 

“Vala?”

 

Standing lopsided and blinking in surprise she answered in a squeaky little voice, “Yes?”

 

“I’m waiting. Are you throwing things in there?”

 

Pressing her forehead to the door she frowned. “Yes.”

 

“Were you serious about…you know…about pretending it never happened?”

 

“Well obviously Daniel it never happened in your easily erased little brain. I’m surprised there’s anything left in there. You must be down to three languages by now.” She heard his laugh and it made her smile.

 

“I remembered something.”

 

“What?” Panic gripped her. Did he remember he didn’t love her? That the whole thing was some kind of joke?

 

“Vala, please open the door. I need to talk to you.”

 

“No. What did you remember?”

 

“The whatevering.”

 

“What? The what?”

 

“You know, the whatevering…the night before…the prior to the defining event, the consummation…tions.”

 

Vala sucked her lips between her teeth and bit down to control the grin of happiness that kept trying to take over her utter annoyance at her reluctant husband. “Go away.” She thumped her head against the door.

 

“Vala, please, we need to talk.”

 

“I can’t let you in.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because I’m…I’m naked…” Her hand went to the door knob when she heard his ‘oh, god’.

 

Head against the other side of the door Daniel closed his eyes. That memory came full blown and staggeringly explicit. Vala naked beneath him, legs wrapped around his waist, back arched, head thrown back and arms flung out, hands gripping the sheets. She moved in ecstasy meeting him in perfect harmony Every time she whispered ‘I love you’ he’d take her so tenderly, slowly that he thought a hundred times that he’d died and ascended. Sacred fulfillment, pure passion, unequivocal loving, rough and desperate joining, they made up for lost time, for the pent up needs of years. For love.

 

“…and if I let you in someone might see you coming in and then they might think we’d be whatevering and then you couldn’t annul the marriage. Go away.”

 

Daniel remained silent trying to recuperate from the memory that had bombarded him.

 

Listening intently Vala heard not a sound. Had he gone? It was a long and tortuous time before her hand on the door knob began to move, but not from her effort, he was turning the knob. Was the door locked? The door was moving! She sat on the floor and snatched her other boot off, then both socks, her eyes on the door pushing slowly inward. Next came her jacket, the T-shirt and she was unbuttoning her pants when the door opened fully and he peeked around it.

 

She grinned all teeth and eyebrows raised. “I was trying to get dressed.”

 

“Oh. Ah. You want to put a shirt on?” Please. I’m dying here. He fought the need to take her right there on the floor.

 

She shrugged her shoulders and looked down at the nice lacy bra she wore (thank every god she’d ever known). “Go away.” She turned her head so he couldn’t see the huge grin on her face.

 

“Vala?” Managing to clear the grin from her face, Vala looked up with a practiced scowl as Daniel continued, “I may not remember everything, but I can tell you this…”

 

“Oh god!” She groaned out, slowly scanning up his long - tight blue jean clad legs, across the T-shirt stretched taut over his chest and into those heavenly blue eyes staring down at her. She had to look away from the intensity of his regard and she placed her hands over her ears. “Don’t tell me! Please! Daniel, I’m begging you, please, please go away.”

 

He squatted down beside her, tight jeans and all. Taking her wrists he pulled her hands from her ears. “I’m not going away; you may as well stop asking that. I’m sorry I don’t remember all of it, I’m sorry I hurt your feelings. Before the last three weeks happened, I realized I loved you. So it’s not in the erased little brain part. It makes sense that what happened, happened. If you didn’t feel the same why did you marry me?”

 

Snatching her wrists free, she turned her face away; he took a finger to her chin and brought it back around. “I…I’m just not… I can’t…I don’t want to be separated. I don’t want to lose your friendship. I don’t want to lose SG-1. I never realized this could turn into such a debacle. I thought it was going to be wonderful…and it’s not.” Where the hell was Muscles! “How can I be married to someone who’s always forgetting? …forgetting to eat, sleep, forgetting even to speak to me? I’m not a needy person Daniel. I can take care of myself. I may want you but I don’t need you…at least I never thought I would.”

 

His finger left her chin and started to fiddle with the lacey bra strap. She wanted a door to bang her head against. Instead she pulled away and stood, taking a hand and knocking him back to the floor. Opening the door Daniel had closed behind him she pointed out into the corridor and spotted Teal’c arriving almost too late.

 

“Okay, but we will talk and without this wacky charade of keep Daniel from Vala.” Reluctantly Daniel left the room without another word. Closing the door softly Vala rested her back against it. Slowly a smile began to twitch at her lips, and then the grin started. Pushing away from the door she emulated Mitchell’s classic ‘touchdown’ arm lift with a loud “YES!”

 

                                                       * * * *

Daniel’s head whipped around when he heard Vala’s excited yell, but his intention to return to her was waylaid by Teal’c. “DanielJackson I have been looking for you.”

 

“Imagine that!” Before Daniel could respond further to Teal’c Mitchell showed up glaring at Teal’c.

 

“YOU were supposed to have been watching the subject.” Mitchell hissed in Teal’c’s ear. “Jackson, I’m done with the IOA. We need to discuss a few things. Mano a Mano.”

 

Opening his mouth in reply, Daniel was once again interrupted, this time by Sam.

 

“Daniel! There you are, I was hoping we could meet for dinner and talk.” Drawing a frustrated breath he gathered his senses to respond when, yes, one last time he was cut off.

 

“Whatcha doin’? How come you didn’t meet me for lunch? We had things to discuss.” Jack barged through the other three and stood smack dab in front of Daniel.

 

Teal’c shot ColonelMitchell an accusing glower, “You,” he whispered fiercely, “were supposed to keep him occupied.”

 

“Where the hell have you been?” Turning to Sam, Mitchell passed the blame with a low gruff voice right next to her ear.

 

Ignoring Mitchell, Sam grabbed Jack’s arm and spun him around. “Hey, wait your turn!”

 

“His turn? What about me? I was here first.” Mitchell had a hold of Sam’s sleeve and pulled her back a pace or two.

 

“I believe, ColonelMitchell, that it was I who was here first.” Teal’c pulled at Mitchell’s shoulder his demeanor clearly indicating his irritation.

 

“Back off big guy.” Mitchell had the audacity to actually shove Teal’c who didn’t move a millimeter. But Mitchell didn’t back away.

 

Daniel looked back and forth between the four in bewildered amusement.

 

“Hold on there, cowboy, let’s not start a ruckus right here in the hall.” Jack pulled his arm loose from Sam’s grip and she hauled off and smacked him on the chest with the back of her hand. “What the hell?!”

 

“What the hell?!” The exact words Jack had said when Daniel called him following the wedding. That’s when it hit him. That’s when the full memory came rushing in like a tsunami. The minister, the vows, the happiness. Daniel literally jerked back from the impact. His head swimming, his body went rigid.

 

The other four were nearly nose to nose all yelling at once. Daniel, eyes closed from dizziness, reached for the support of the wall when his hand encountered something soft. Vala.

 

Suddenly clear headed he opened his eyes and snatched her into a bear hug of an embrace and kissed her like a starved man. Her arms wrapped so tight around his neck her elbows over lapped and she responded to his kiss like a ravenous animal. Still clinched together Daniel managed to move her backwards into her room, somehow got the door closed and locked and started backing her towards the bed.

 

Breathlessly she insisted, “Wait, wait.” Reluctantly breaking free of him Vala grabbed something from a drawer and manipulated the locking mechanism. “There. It’ll take Siler hours to fix that!” She slammed back into Daniel and took up where she left off.

 

He had to escape the suction of her mouth to breathe. “I love you. I remember everything too, but I loved you anyway. God, I love you.”

 

She let out a small cry mumbling “I love you” over and over into the heat of his mouth. They were both ignoring the knocking at the door.

 

The hall went quiet and the four stood looking sheepishly at each other. “Ah, I’m buying the beer.” Jack offered in apology.

 

“No, no, I should buy the beer.” Mitchell stated miserably.

 

“Let me buy the beer. I should buy. You guys always buy.” Sam took Jack’s hand and squeezed it.

 

“I’m buying. I said it first.”

 

“Yes Sir, but I’m the one who started this whole thing.”

 

Jack turned with a frown. “Mitchell, I’m buying the god damned beer! It’s my fault. I started it!”

 

“How the hell do you figure that? This is all my fault and I’m buyin’ the beer!”

 

Teal’c stepped between Mitchell and Jack. “Iwill buy the beer. I will drink some of the beer and that is final!”

 

Mitchell jabbed a pointed finger through the air, “Well there ya have it!”

 

“Not a problem T, whatever you say. Come on Carter let’s get you drunk.”

 

The four walked side by side down the hall arguing over where to go for the beer. “I’ve had lunch at O’Malley’s every day I’ve been here.” “Yeah, well we just had dinner at the Barbeque place…” “I thought we were trying the new brew house next?” “Perhaps we should just go to ColonelCarter’s.” And on and on it went.

 

                                                       * * * *

Jack, Sam and Teal’c were eating breakfast a few days later waiting on Mitchell, who eventually appeared looking rather despondent. He stopped beside the commissary table without sitting. “Ah…they’re really not really married.”

 

“ColonelMitchell, we can safely assume that some…consummation has occurred.” Teal’c didn’t bother looking up.

 

“Not that. This…” He tossed a newspaper on the table. “Front page, headline news. Read it and weep.” The large bold type read: Man posing as minister illegally marries over a hundred couples. “Take a look at the list of names.” Jabbing a finger at the list Mitchell sat down and crossed his arms.

 

Sam read the two names aloud, “Dr. Daniel Jackson and Vala Mal Doran. Oh boy, we’re gonna have to tell them.”

 

Jack laughed out loud, “Yeah, but now we have to wait ‘til they get back from the honeymoon.”

 

 

                                                                                   ** The End **      

 

 

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