Just Another
By: gioia_gg
CATEGORY: General, Humor
SEASON/SPOILERS: Season 10
WARNINGS: None
AUTHOR’S NOTES: I borrowed one line from Ugly Betty. I love Marc and Amanda. They’re really hilarious. Kudos to my wonderful beta, Isabel. Without her, this thing wouldn’t be something readable ;) This will be a multi-chapter one.
AUTHOR’S WEBSITE:
http://gioia-gg.livejournal.com/
CHAPTER 1
Vala was lying on her abdomen on her bed, her legs swaying
aimlessly in the air as she wondered at the sheer ingeniusness of the women of
Earth. Putting pictures of Taye Diggs covered in baby oil into
magazines was the absolute brightest idea that she had ever seen.
She heard a knock at the door while turning the pages over. "Come
in." She yelled without bothering to look who was coming in.
“I think I’ve something here that might interest you.” Daniel said, coming in
through the door looking at the items inside the box he was holding between his
hands. He lifted his head and his eyebrows drifted over to his hairline. A
Vala, clad in tiny green boxer shorts and a matching tee shirt was sprawled on
her bed, one hand was under her chin as the other one held a magazine whose
cover had a shirtless Taye Diggs in all his glory, should not be something that
surprised him anymore but it did anyway.
“Unless it’s Taye Diggs covered in baby oil, I doubt it.” She said absently, still focused on her magazine. He rolled his eyes and opened his mouth, probably to say something snarky, but she cut him off as she threw her magazine back and sat on her legs on the bed.
“I was kidding.” She sighed dramatically. And he noticed that she wasn’t wearing any bra under her shirt. He reopened his mouth but she cut him off again, waving her hand deliberately in the air like saying whatever as she leaned forward.
“What’s so important that it has brought you right into my lair?” She threw at him a sultry glance.
“Why don’t you put a robe on?” He suggested in return as his eyes dropped to look her breasts.
She ducked her head for checking herself out and then smirked. “Why?” She arched back, putting her breasts on show. “It’s not like that you haven’t seen them before.” She teased him with an amused tone.
He moved his hand over his hair, ruffling it as he sighed deeply. “Just put that damn thing on.” Whenever it was about dealing with Vala, his patience seemed to be non-existant.
“Fine.” She said with a pout as making her way over to her bathroom door where her robe hung making sure to sway her hips and give him another free show. She turned a white silk robe over her knees but it was really nothing but a little distraction, still it was better than nothing. “Happy?” She threw her hands in the air and gave him a pose.
He ignored the question, picked up one item from the box and showed it to her. She gave a look over the box and then looked at the item at his hand. She narrowed her eyes, her forehead wrinkling. “SG-11 and SG-13 found them at PX4-489’s ruins. I think they’re Goa’uld, I mean the ruins are, but I didn’t find any resemblance to any other Goa’uld technologies we had seen before. I could ask Teal’c but he’s off base, you know. And I really want to know a little more about them before giving them to sci-team.” He looked at her slightly disturbed figure and furrowed his forehead. “Are you familiar with them?”
“Yeah.” She said stiffly, still looking troubled. But after a beat, she smiled one of her big, cheesy smiles and one eyebrow lifted up. Sometimes he wondered how her eyebrows managed to move respectively like that. He was sure she practiced it in front of the mirror at nights. “I did have a device like that once.” She indicated the little red, round device at his hand. “Actually, you’ve gotta be familiar with them too. I’m really surprised that you didn’t recognize it the first time, being of a Beloved of Hathor and all.” She pursed her lips as he put the box down on her bed.
Daniel looked back to her, dumbfounded for a moment; his mouth was open in awe. “What?” He managed to get after a moment.
She rolled her eyes. “How do you know about Hathor?” Daniel asked tersely.
She rolled her eyes once again, wrinkling her nose. “Infirmary rumors.” He didn’t ask anymore questions. Those damn nurses, always chatting about them, placing polls…
“I don’t remember much from my time with her, I was drugged.” He added but then remembered how this conservation had started. He looked at her one second; putting two and two together as one possible conclusion came to his mind. God, for a genius he could be so slow sometimes.
“You mean, this device belonged to Qetesh?”
“Not that one, silly.” She took it from his hand, putting little things on her two fingers. “I’ve not seen any of them since Tok’ra removed the symbiote.” She sighed dramatically, moving her hand over to her hair, throwing it at her back. “My life could be a hell of a lot more easy with just one of them.”
His head snapped back to her. “What do you mean?”
She shook her head, sighing even more dramatically. “Daniel, the devices that I’ve just told you that were like this one,” She raised her arm up, showing the device on her hand. “They belonged to two love goddesses.” She looked at him tauntingly. “Use your imagination.”
His eyebrows vanished above his hairline. “You mean, they are…”
“Yes!” She cut him off as she turned her hand over to herself, smirking. “Well, they were proven to being very useful.”
“You mean, they are sorts of high-advance sex toys?” He asked, laughing in disbelief.
She threw her hands into air. “Well, darling. Even goddesses need some lovin’.” Her voice was sultry as she winked at him. But she dropped the act and became serious once again. “They were supposed to be love goddess. They needed put people into the right mood. With that one,” She looked down at the device. “One could put some dirty images in the mind of person who is being under effect of the device.” She leaned over the box on the bed and picked up another long black red item, smirking down. “And that one,” She rolled on her tongue the last word, smirking. “I can put the entire base into the right mood, if you catch my drift.” She played with that thought a little, amusement in her eyes as Daniel’s eyes were terrified.
“Qetesh used to utilize it for her spring festa. Did I tell you about her thoughts on the spring and yeah, the fertility? How is it supposed to be?” She asked more to herself. “She certainly had some ideas about fertility.” She looked at him, narrowed her eyes dangerously.
“You don’t believe me.” She stated accusingly. “I could turn it on over you if you don’t believe me.” She suggested nicely smirking sultrily.
He grabbed her arm and removed the device off her hand. “No, thanks. I think I’ll pass.” He put it into box. “And you don’t get near them. Thirty feet between you and them.”
She pouted, putting her hand on his shoulder. “Darling, you don’t trust me? I’m hurt.” She purred as laughing throatily. He gave her a look. She sighed exaggerated. “It was Nefetiti’s.” She sat on the bed, playing the hems of her robe, looking at the floor. He gave her a blank look, wrinkled his forehead in confusion.
“These things belonged to Nefertiti. There is her sigil on them. You know her, don’t you?” She asked carefully.
“No,… yes.” He shook his head. “I’ve known her from Egyptian mythology. But I had no idea that she was a Goa’uld too.”
“She was.” She shrugged her shoulder off. “A really minor one.” She looked thoughtful for a moment. “SG-11 and SG-13 are still on PX3-whereveritis, aren’t they?” He nodded at her.
“We’ve got to go there too.” She looked at him, expectantly. Daniel shook his head. Somehow, he could not think that bringing Vala into ex-love goddess’s ruins was the best idea.
“I don’t think so.”
“Why?” She asked sincerely but did not let him respond her question. “Without me you would still have no idea what they were. I’ve gotta be there, being only expert on sex goddesses, vice versa.” He snorted. She was aware that she wasn’t too convincing so she changed her approach a little. “Daniel, didn’t you said that after Ori were gone, we should be focus our research for finding out about old cultures, learning from them and learning about ourselves along the way?” She put her hand on his leg, looking at his eyes.
“Yeah,” He mumbled under his breath and tilted his head. She could see his archeologistic interest, his need for knowledge --whatever kind it was-- had peaked and she could see it in his now sparkling eyes. Whatever he was feeling about love goddesses; there were still a part of big picture. Facets. Of love and desire. Facets. And he needed to know, to understand all of them. When she looked at him again, she knew that she had already won this fight.
“And you’ll learn about yourself along the way?” He asked carefully.
She shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe. Who knows? And don’t tell me that you’re not interested. I know that look in your eyes. They’re sparkling.” She pointed with her index finger right into his eyes.
“Didn’t your mum tell you that pointing with index finger is rude, especially when you’re putting that finger into someone else’s eyes? And my eyes don’t sparkle.” He said, moving her finger off from his eyes.
She laughed, bumping her hip a little on his. “Yeah, they do. You get them when you’re interested with something. Big sparkling eyes.”
He snorted. “Ok, maybe I’m a little bit interested.” But he
stopped as another thought struck him. “But Teal’c is off-world on some
business regarding
“Yeah, yeah, big loss.” She mumbled under her breath. “It’s not like they would be big help, no offense but they already have their military people, Daniel. What they need is that the experts on the Gau’old.”
“SG-11 and SG-13 also have experts.” He pointed out.
“But not us. Otherwise you couldn’t have been here, asking me about devices.” She reasoned as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He nodded his head, mumbling under his breath.
“Yeah, you’re right.”
“I’m always right, Daniel. You just don’t realize it sometimes.”
“Uh-huh.”
She gave him another bright smile and he stood up from bed, began to walk over to the door.
“Hey, did you eat something?” She asked his behind, putting her hands on her belly. “I’m starving.”
He turned over to her. “Nope. I’m goin’ home. I’m still not so convinced that this is a good idea so I’ve gotta still convince me that it is.” He said jokingly.
“Can I help?” She winked at him. He shook his head.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Vala.” He said as he left the room.
CHAPTER 2
According to Vala, in all the world, no scratch that, in all the galaxy there wasn't a more annoying person than Daniel. He was completely, totally, utterly, and as far as any adjectives could possibly go on, the most annoying individual that she had the misfortune to meet.
Firstly, he did not share her opinions regarding those lovely devices they had found in the temples, aka the wet dreams of every archeology geek. He always put them under lock and key in his quarters at the that pitiful establishment where they had sat their camp, and he had made damn sure that she was always a whole nine yards away from them.
Secondly, yeah, they were on this god-awful planet long enough (more precisely two weeks) for him to have very big quarters, while she had the service room of his big royalty room. That was totally retarded, staying in his service room (well, it was connected to his room so…), putting his translations in order, taking photos in the temples, bringing to him his coffee— of course he never asked for coffee but anyway, it was all his fault that he had the most admirable smile in the world.
Thirdly, once again he had managed to screw up her brilliant seduction plan. It had been a real challenge to get him drunk. Because he knew his own weaknesses and tried not to touch anything that included alcohol, but after a working day, she got him where she wanted: sprawled on her bed. He had stood up for a moment, caressing her chin and stating that she had the most beautiful eyes in the world (no real surprise there, she had already figured out that he was attracted to her.) But after a second he had thrown up on her!! Literally, threw up on her. Then he had gone directly into oblivion, and she was left to clean up his mess.
He was completely confusing her with his antics. One moment he was doing something so sweet and considerate, she felt those damn butterflies she had read about in the book she had borrowed from Sam had been talking about, in her stomach; and right after he acted like nothing had happened.
Like the last morning when she had to use the healing device on the people who had been injured in an accident. After the sixth person, she had been so tired that just standing on her own two feet was a struggle, but she insisted to go to heal another person. He had then pushed her against the wall, holding her shoulders so tightly that she had known that next morning she would have had some bruises, and told her to stop being so damn stubborn. She had raised her chin then, and responded to him that she learned that—caring people—from him, he had looked directly into her eyes and one moment she was so sure that he was going to kiss her. However, after a second, he let go of her, turned back, and acted as if nothing had happened the rest of day. Nope, nothing. Nada. Zero.
Vala was not a moron, even though she sometimes acted like one. She realized that he was so fucked up (another brilliant Tau’ri word combination) that he was not going to pass whatever boundaries he had put between them, and act on the feelings that she assumed he had for her. Seriously, if he had decided to pursue it, he would have already made his move by now.
Unfortunately, (for her) he still meant so much to her. If she could not have a role in his more personal life, then she would be ok just being his one of best friends. But to do that, she had to get rid of those damn butterflies inside her stomach. And it meant that he had to be annoying all time so she could get pissed off him, then hopefully, those butterflies would be out of question and all would be ok.
See, that was what she called good planning.
Fortunately for her he was doing his part in her plan so damn well by knocking on her door as if his life depend on it while in her dream, things were getting interesting.
She tossed her blanket around, putting her pillow over her face. “Go away.”
“Vala, wake up right now.” Came his annoyed voice from outside. “We've been waiting for you since the morning.”
“Still morning.”
“No, the morning has long passed. And you've ten minutes to dress and Vala,” he faltered for a moment. “Don't try to be look nice. We don't care.”
Absolutely. The. Most. Fucking. Annoying. Person. In. Two. Galaxies.
By the time he knocked on her door a second time, she was busy to dealing with the hems of her robe (Another of Daniel’s fucking brilliant ideas). She looked at her watch on her wrist.
“Go away, you ha'tek. I've still two minutes.”
An exaggerated chuckle could be heard from the other side of the door. “Language, my dear. Or I'm gonna have to clean that pretty mouth of yours.” That mere comment alone earned him a colorful rant in the Gao'uld language.
“Well then, it seems that I've to drink this amazing coffee all by myself. One sugar, with cream, just like the way you like it.”
The door opened magically. She looked at the coffee between his hands.
He was the most generous soul in two galaxies. “Oh, I love you.” She deadpanned.
He smirked. “Wow, the quickest change of heart in the history of the galaxy. Wasn't I a pompous he'tak in the celt'ac a few minutes ago.”
Generous soul, my pretty ass, she thought. “I was talking with my coffee.” She pursed her lips, and bumped her shoulder with his on purpose as she walked out of her room.
“My, are we a little cranky, today?” He asked disgustingly bright.
She took a sip from coffee. “I woke up on the the wrong side of the bed.” She threw suspicious sideway looks at him. “Why are you so cheerful, anyway?” She got closer, looking at him sternly. “Are you high or something? Don't tell me you smoked that long pipe thing!”
“Don't be ridiculous. You're just crabby today.”
“Well, maybe I would not be crabby if someone didn't wake me up with a performance of “Stomp” at my door. You, accounting boy,” One of the accountant of the SGC (Woolsey's brilliant idea) hit her hand by mistake as passing by; she shook the spilled coffe off from her hand. “Watch out.”
“Stomp?”
“Teal'c.” She answered in return.
“Don't call him accounting boy. It's not flattering.”
She turned back and looked the man. “Why? It's what he’s doing, right? He's accounting our expenses.”
He shrugged off as breathed out. “Well, yeah. But… It seems that they don't like him here. Pity, I talk with him sometimes. He seems a decent guy. I wonder why...”
“I've really no idea, Daniel. Maybe they saw him kicking puppies and kittens.”
“Geez, Vala...Are you PMS'ing or what?” He said as they walked out the inn and joined the group outside.
“Am I what--?”
“Never mind.”
Another archeologist from SG-11 came beside them, looking really enthusiastic. “Dr. Jackson, earlier morning SG-13 found another temple over the west side of hills.”
“Fan-freaking-tastic.” She applauded exaggratingly, smiling the most possible cheesy smile as Daniel jabbed her in her side.
The archeologist looked at her oddly without saying anything. “We considered to going there to look around. Do you mind to join us?”
“Ohh..no. There are still things I want to see at the east side of hills.”
“Oh joy.” She mumbled.
When archeologist left them alone, he grabbed her arm, making her turn to him. “What's wrong with you?”
“Nothing.” She pulled her arm from his grip. “Lead the way, darling.”
By the time they finally arrived the East temple, Vala thought that her plan had worked well. They had been walking for almost two hours and Vala had already managed to start four different fights. One about her lack of breakfast while eating, something disgusting on her feet while walking, one about his walking too fast, one about the the dreadful combination of sand and sun although that one really wasn’t his fault and one was about absolutely nothing. He had ignored her most of the time and she was feeling quite miserable and frustrated, but there were no stupid butterflies in her stomach, so all was pretty good.
But when she had whined that she was going to have a sore thumb nail from all the walking, he had growled at her to shut the hell up and stop bitching around, she realized that her plan might not work out so well. Oh goodness, she had totally forgotten how ridiculously hot and totally do-able he looked when he was frustrated.
When they were inside, Daniel began to work on tablets attached onto the walls and handed to Vala his camera, charging her to take pictures.
Five minutes later she called him as he was concentratıng on the writings on the wall.
“Gimme a minute?” He mumbled under his breath.
“Daniel?” She called again, tapping her foot onto floor.
“Still not a minute.”
“Daniel!!”
“What?!”
“Just smile!” A flash exploded before his eyes. She moved the camera in front of her eyes, looking at his picture of big open eyes. “You look dumbfounded.”
Daniel rolled his eyes at her, but she was being her nice and sweet self again so he didn’t say anything.
“I’ve not seen you this surprised since we met. The time when I pretended a Kull Warrior who was hitting on you.” She chuckled out aloud. “Those wonderful ol’days.”
He groaned softly. “Please make me a favor. Do not talk about that ever, ever again. You stole ten years from my life with that little prank of yours.” He stared at her, but he didn’t look like he pissed, actually he looked amused. “Actually I always wondered how you got your hands on a suit.”
“Well, Arnord had it. How he got it? Who knows? Who cares?”
He snorted loudly. “I should have guessed. That poor man.”
“What? It was not as if he would have used them anyway. He is just too short to be a Kull Warrior.”
He snorted again and marked somewhere along the wall.
“If you had known what kinds of troubles I had to endure because of those things you couldn’t behave like this.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Firstly, I had to quell his suspicious nature stroke by making him believe that I was harmless,” She began to count with her fingers. “Then I had to stroke his manly ego so he'd see himself as my hero. All so that he could open to me up a little and I could get in his lovely place. And how do you think I had managed to make Andron believing that he was my hero?”
“I'm not sure I want to know.” He commented sarcastically under his breath.
“I hired some goons and told them to shake me up a little, just enough to convince Andron that I was a damsel in distress. That act gets you all time. But the goons carried on, and knocked me into oblivion. I got a real concussion.”
“Wow, the most elaborate plan to get into a guy's pants.”
She rolled her eyes. “Why, thanks.” She pursed her lips. “Actually, it wasn't mine. I got the idea from a girl who hired me to kidnap her and leave a threatening note to the boy she loved so he could come and rescue her. Well, that also didn't work as we planned.”
“Really?” He asked sarcastically. “Why?”
“We waited for him to grace us with his presence for almost two weeks, but to no avail. He just didn’t show up.” She thought for a moment. “Well, come to think of it, I didn’t necessarily have to get into his pants either.”
One eyebrow lifted. “Necessarily?”
She smirked. “I have standards.”
He snorted.
She glared.
“I’ve seen him too, remember? He had different ideas about that.” He faltered a moment as she mumbled under her breath ‘I bet he has.’ “Running naked under the stars rings any bell?”
“And what--you believed him? Come on, Daniel,” She began defensively. “This doesn’t mean that I actually run naked under stars—“She cut herself off. “Well, not with him anyway.”
A wink.
He groaned one more time.
She smirked down. “First off, I was concussed for some time,” She began again her finger counting. “Secondly, he can’t hold his liquor well, like someone I know,” She half-smirked as he rolled his eyes. “I figured out that I could use it to my own advantage. I made him drink himself into oblivion and sold him severeal elaborate stories about our adventurous night the next morning.” Maybe she shouldn’t have said this to him, he might get paranoid about the drinking, but she had already used that trick and it hadn't worked according to plan either. Oh, the cleaning of that mess once, was enough for her entire life.
She exhaled exaggeratedly. “Don't give me that look. I was desperate. There was a whole bounty hunter family on my tail, looking for my pretty head. I had to hijack a ship.”
“Then I screwed up things, and you drowned into more trouble than ever.”
“Till my neck, pretty much sums it up.” She nodded her head.
“You came to Earth beacuse of that, didn't you? You were looking for a place to hide in, and you got lucky and found the treasure too.”
“Well, you can't say that was a bad reason.”
“And here I am, always thinking you came back because you had found me so attractive.” He winked at her this time.
“Oh, no. That was just a bonus.” She said as the butterflies began flipping inside her.
CHAPTER 3
“So…What’s your favorite breakfast, cereal?”
“…”
“Fruit loops or Cocoa Pops’?”
“…”
“Or CaptNCrunch?”
“…”
“What type of milk do you prefer?”
“…”
“Full cream or low fat?”
“…”
She changed the angle. “Who takes care of your place when you’re off-world?”
“…”
“Cuz, it has to be pretty dusty if there’s no one to do that.”
“Vala, do not assume that just because you’re speaking it means I’m actually listening. I’m well trained in kel’no’reem which has various techniques for drowning out annoying distractions.” Daniel replied coolly.
“...”
“Why kel’no’reem? Why not something else like…I dunno, T’ai Chi?” She smiled at him brightly.
“…”
“…”
“Or yoga.” She pursed her lips up. “It’s good for one’s body too, if you catch my drift.”
He dropped his pen to the floor as he turned back to her, growling under his breath. “Look, I thought we made a deal that you were not disturb me, or distracting me…” He said, picking up the pen from the floor.
“First of all, we didn’t make any deal. You just told me that I’m not allowed to leave and wander off alone or do things without your permission which included looking for any lovely devices. So what else I’m supposed to do if I can’t talk with you too?”
“Sit down and be quiet for a change.” He threw his hands into air. “Or it’s too much to ask?” She pouted and sat on the floor across of the room.
“...”
“...”
“I don’t suppose, I could---“
“No!”
She furrowed her forehead, narrowing her eyes. “I didn’t even finish my question. How can you answer no without hearing my request?”
“Your request was going to be that you doing something other than sitting down and shutting the hell up. So my answer was a simple no. Now be quiet or I’ll tie your mouth shut.”
“Oh. Really?” She roared at him. “Someone's getting kinky...”
He threw a deadly glance at her.
She rolled her eyes. “Have you ever been told that you’re no fun Daniel?” His name rolled over her mouth like silk.
“Well, actually I have been, Vala. By Jack, some old friends, ex girlfriends, by pretty much all of my college friends.” He grinned fakely, his head tilting to his side.
She grinned toothily. “Good. I won’t bother to tell you again then.”
He was about to respond with a snarky cutting reply when he felt the tremors under his feet. Apparently Vala felt it too because she stood up on her feet in a heartbeat, looking around in wonder.
“What’s happening?”
“I don’t know.” He mumbled under his breath, looking the falling dust from temple’s roof. Then with a roaring sound, that made his ears jingle, the floor under his feet began to crack.
“Run!”
“It’s an earthquake.” He heard Vala’s voice under the roar as he ran over to her and clasped her hand.
Then all hell broke loose. They were running madly along the exit tunnel when the ruins blocked their way. He turned back to the other side as the stones still fell from the above. He then saw the ruins of the temple falling on him as a big sharp stone hit Vala’s head, making her scream as she fell on her back. He yelled at her, screamed her name, but after a moment the darkness claimed him and he did not neither see nor hear anything after.
The first thing that he became aware of when he came around was the throbbing pain along his ribs. He tried to stand up, to push the stones off from his body as he hissed through his teeth. After some failed attempts, he managed to stay up on his feet, sweat running down on his dusty robe. He checked his body, looking for any broken bones or deep gashes, but aside from the pain in his ribs he did not seem to have any other injuries. Then a few feet away he saw glimpses Vala’s limp body under the ruins. He ran over to her, pulling her out of the piles of stones she was buried under. He laid her gently on the floor as he pushed her bloody hair from her forehead, looking the lump on the left side of her head.
He shook up her a little, calling her name a gentle voice. “Vala? Are you okay?”
She fluttered her eyes, wincing in pain. “Ohh…My head.”
“Are you ‘kay?”
“Yeah, I s’posse.” She tried to sit up but Daniel made her rest against the floor.
He reached for his radio and pressed the button on trying to connect, but to no avail. “This is Dr. Daniel Jackson. We’re stuck in east side of the temples. I repeat. We’re stuck. Please, come in.” He listened his own voice over the static of the radio. It was a dead end.
“It isn’t working.” He lifted his head up and looked at the little opening in the now ruined roof. It was too small and high on the recently ruined walls, he thought it would be impossible to reach it or go through it.
He looked back to Vala, smiling reassuringly. “Stay here. I’ll go and check around a little. Our front blocked with the ruins and that little window thing is too high to reach. I want to see what there is behind us. This tunnel might have another exit. I’ll be back soon.” She protested, standing up but he pushed her gently on her back.
“No. Stay here. I’ll come back soon.”
She shook her head dreamily then he was off with the grief of leaving her alone. The tunnel he was wandering was a narrow passage between the halls so after a while, he was not surprised when he saw the passage opened to absolutely nowhere. He returned the spot where the earthquake blocked them inside only for seeing Vala had gone back to sleep again.
He came to her, tapping her gently on her shoulders. “Vala?”
No responds.
He shook her this time with force. “Vala, wake up!”
Still no responds.
He reached for her shoulders. “Open your eyes!” The panic rose inside him as the millions of possibilities worked in his mind. What if she was unconscious from the time he had left her? How much time had passed? He looked down at his wrist but his watch had broken during the earthquake. He cursed some profanities under his breath that would have probably even made Vala blush as he leaned over her.
"Come on, Vala, wake up.”
Still no responds.
“Vala!!” He snapped her name over and over, shaking her up
bit. “Wake up! Dammit, you can not
just lay around, you have to wake up. Come on, open your eyes.” His voice now
sounded desperate, making a slight echo at the tunnel’s broken walls. “I'll buy you new sunglasses or new
After a few moments that seemed longer than the hours, she finally opened her eyes, unfocused.
"Wha- Where?"
"It's okay. Open your eyes." He said reassuringly, putting his hand on her face.
"What-" She blinked in confusion. "Huh?"
"Come on, all the way, Vala. Look at me."
"...Daniel?"
He sighed with relief. "Very good.” He said approvingly. “Welcome back.”
Her forehead furrowed as she tried to focus on him. “What happened?" She winced in pain as she looked around her.
He felt a stone drop in his stomach.
"Don’t you remember? An earthquake. The ruins hit your head as they were falling, remember?"
"Oh."
"Yes." He saw her closing her eyes once more. “Open your eyes, no more sleeping."
"But-"
"No buts. Eyes open. Focus on my face."
"'Kay. Open."
"Good. Keep them that way." She snorted a little as she rolled her eyes.
He rolled his eyes in return and sat back on the floor beside her. "You're awake. Good."
She grinned weakly. "Kind of more awake, anyway. And, getting some whatsyoucalledit--oh, yeah. Déjà vu.”
“What do you remember?" he asked, looking at her carefully.
She furrowed her forehead like he always did when he was concentraing on something. "We left the establishment for the east side of temple and you were so annoying during our trip.” She threw at him a cold galnce. “I remembered you yelling at me to shut the hell up.” He mumbled something under his breath which she didn’t pick up. “The next thing I know, I'm waking up here with the endearing company of a rock band in my head and you yelling at me again."
"And I'm not going to apologize for the yelling; it did wake you up." He grinned fakely at her.
She glared at him. "That's really not very surprising. Do you mind to fill in the blanks?"
"Not much." He crossed his arms over his chest again, "After we entered, I looked at the writings as you took the pictures of them."
"So?"
"So, I kept studying the writings while you got bored with taking pictures and began to whine again -" Vala snorted, giving him another cool look; Daniel lifted his eyebrows at her, but kept going. "When we were having our lovely snarky banter, we both heard the noises of the earthquake under our feet. We began to run over the exit but the tunnel,” He shifted his shoulders against the wall, in search for a more comfortable position with no success. "the ruins began collapsing around us and we both lost consciousness."
"I woke you up, after I came around, then left here to check the back of tunnel but when I returned I found you into sleep again. I almost couldn't wake you up this time, so there will be no more sleeping,” He said as she tried to sit up again. He pushed her back down again. “Or trying to sit up - sudden movement isn't the best idea with a head injury."
"Right. I knew that. Thanks." She said sarcastically.
"I just don't want you to throw up on my pants. It could get very disgusting in here."
Vala smiled faintly and muttered something that definitely
sounded like a
"Excuse me? And keep your eyes open."
She started to shake her head, winced, and stopped. "Nothing. How long have we been out?" she said, looking at the passing sunlight coming from opening above them.
"Call it half an hour; I s'ppose. Our watches broke during the fall and I’ve no certain way of knowing how long this planet's daytime lasts, but if I had to make an educational guess, it would be an half of hour.” He sighed deeply, lost in his own thoughts.
She tried to run her hands through her hair, wincing when she hit the large, bloody lump on the left side of her head. "Ok. Do you have any plan?"
"Huh?"
Vala gave him a look. "A plan?” She repetead.
"Ahh. Yes. Well,--If you mean other than expecting rescuing team," He breathed out aloud. "No."
"Oh." She said miserably. She looked at him but said nothing.
“I’m sure I’ll figure something out soon.” He said hopefully.
She just sighed. “This is just such a mess.”
Daniel wrinkled his nose as he looked around them, squinting up at the faint sunlight-- "I think dusty and dank pretty much sums it up. I guess at least we should be glad the sun is setting, because otherwise I'm pretty sure it would make your headache even worse but--” He trailed off. After a while, he came closer to her. "Look over here, I want to check you out."
"Ah, it's only in circumstances like these that I ever hear that from you," Vala said with an exaggerated sigh. He just grimaced. She grinned. "Could be good for the story, though: 'As I lay as his feet, Daniel leaned over and gazed deeply into my eyes--'"
"Are you writing a romance novel now? Didn't know you had a thing for those kinds of things." He cupped his hand over her left eye, lifted them up, waited a few seconds, then checked her pupil which was slightly larger than the right. His stomach tightened, and he said lightly, "Congratulations, you're concussed."
"You say the sweetest things."
CHAPTER 4
After a while, the inactivity got to her and she started fidgeting where she lay, trying to sit up. "Stay still, I meant it about not wanting to deal with vomit," he warned her, before getting up to walk around the tunnel.
“If there was any thing like justice in this world or galaxy, you would have been already choked to death with my late breakfast!” She exclaimed, scowling at him. Her headache was getting worse and he didn't help with his annoying attitude much.
He ignored her once again, looking around. There was a little narrow opening on the top of the walls, too far out of reach. Dirty, cracked walls, dusty hard dike floors, and more dust, pretty much everywhere. No ancient artifact or device. No furniture of any kind. They had left their packs in the throne room as they escaped, so, no blankets, no first aid kit, not even a lame aid band. Their radios were broken, their guns and knives were also in the throne room. He hadn't taken any explosive material with him before he had left their camp site so... Maybe it would be better if he stopped counting the things he didn’t have with himself and began to count the things he had instead.
Well, they had their clothes. He took of his robe and threw it across the tunnel. He then searched his combo suit. A chocolate bar, a thin flashlight which was could be useful later, a broken pen, his notes, another half of a chocolate bar... He threw his head against the wall, and growled in desperation. Nothing useful to help them escape.
He wondered if the other teams had escaped from earthquake without injuries and if they were on their way to help them. Because otherwise, this mission will go in a much worse direction, if that was possible. He passed his hands over the ruins that blocked them inside, looking for any possible crack into them for the sake of doing something, however useless it was. He didn't even find any slits; therefore he began to pull the little stones off, leaving the oversized ones in their place in hopes of making a possible opening in them. He then began to work on big ones, groaning loudly as every muscle in his body cried in pain; his face was unrecognizable as he pulled rocks and threw them over his shoulders onto the floor with all his strength. Again, and again to no avail. It was just useless. There were too many of them for one person to cope with.
"Could we have less noise, please?" She asked after a while, her voice small with pain.
Daniel stopped, working on his breathing and placed his hands on the wall as the room spun slightly around him. "Sorry." He mumbled. His rib was throbbing in pain, he felt dizzy and his headache was kicking in. He wondered how much time would have to pass before the SGC learned the news in case that SG-11 and SG-13 were also stuck in somewhere else.
“S' okay," she said, shaking her hand aimlessly in his general direction. "I’m sorry. It’s just my headache. I wished it had worked."
He looked at her in wonder trying to think what about she was talking about. "Oh, yeah. I know." He walked back to her very carefully, and sat down with his back on the wall. Her eyes slid over to him watching him intently. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," he said shortly. "There's nothing wrong." He did not want to worry her more than she already was.
Vala gave him the same exact suspicious look Jack had always used when he had said the same line to him in the missions, especially when he had been apparently not fine. Sometimes it made Daniel wonder how much she and Jack were alike, even when they were completely different. She fidgeted around to look at him more carefully. Well, even given how different they were; they still had something very much in common: his damn well being. “I'm fine,” he repeated. “And since I'm not the one with the head injury, could you please lie back down, before you throw up?"
He tugged the robe closer around her, as she stilled herself, giving him another suspicious look, but not arguing. "You know, my stomach isn't even that upset; you're the one who’s fascinated with the idea of me vomiting on you."
He passed his fingers through his hair, ruffling it, sighing deeply. "I know. I'm sorry. It just that-- I'm worried." He looked down at her pale figure as his head starting to pound again with frustration and worry. They had all escaped from situations worse than this; both of them had even come back from the dead, but they could not get themselves out of a damn, ruined temple.
"How long do you think it'll take the rest of teams to show up?" She said, refusing the idea that they would also be in the same situation.
“If they weren’t trapped like us, it would be sooner than later. They have the equipment to find us.” He said flatly, trying not to make any speculation.
“If they were?” Vala asked with a small voice that slurred faintly, and he glanced down at her sharply.
"Hey, eyes open! Write a good beginning for that story of yours or something." She fought to keep her eyes open. "Well, in that case we’ll have to wait for the villagers to find us. I’m sure they will be aware of us not returning to the village soon. But I’m sure that it would be unnecessary. I’ll figure out something soon, to get us out of here. You know, I’m a genius." Daniel said lightly, looking over to her. “Hey, eyes open!” He added, when he saw her as closing her eyes once again. “Talk to me. Tell me something exciting.”
She grinned at him faintly. “What about my first time?”
“I think I'm passing on that privilege.”
“See, you're no fun.” She chuckled, then stopped and made a note to herself: Do not laugh when you are concussed.
“Well, I thought we already established that fact.” He said, keeping the banter up. Banter was good. It was keeping her awake and alert.
“Just making sure. So what about my first kiss?”
Now he chuckled out aloud. “Shoot.”
“Well, it was with Brenin, I was nine or ten, I s'posse. He was being a total jerk, so I kissed him.”
“Excuse me?” Daniel asked, raising his left eyebrow.
“Ah, he'd said that I couldn't kiss any boy because of-being, well--a girl. So I kissed him. It was a challenge. Good one though, he had to work very hard to beat me after that.” She said, smiling a little.
“Uh-Oh.”
“We were best friends.” She said, nostalgia sneaking into her voice. “He lived next to our farm. We knew each other since we were little troublesome brats, and even if he could be a clueless jerk sometimes, he was a good guy, my best friend.” She said proudly, lost already in her memories. “We always got ourselves in trouble, but somehow he always saved my skin. His innocent little farm boy act always got them. Actually, he was an innocent farm boy.” She furrowed her brows, her head tilting to her side. “He had big, green eyes and when he stared at you with his puppy dog eyes, you could do nothing, but fall for his charm. Not that he knew that of course. I dunno, sometimes I thought that maybe his power on people came from it, his own oblivion about his charm.”
“We used to watch the clouds together sometimes, trying to compare them to something else. I used to tell stories, the tales about people who lived in a world far, far away beyond the horizon. Brenin would laugh at me, telling me I was such a big liar. He always thought, all his life, he was going to end up living on his little world, working on his farm, while I was wondering about what was beyond the horizon.” Her voice faltered, raw with emotion. “I sometimes thought of myself not a good girl back in those days. Mum always told me that I was too curious for my own sake. But you couldn't have found a person who would have bad thoughts of him among the two galaxies.” After a moment, she looked around in confusion as if she wasn't sure what had just happened. She took a deep breath as she realized Daniel was looking her in wonder, his mouth open in awe.
She pouted fakely. “You got me all sentimental here.”
* * * *
After some talking and light banter to clean air, they sat silently for what felt like forever. After a while, the inactivity got him again and he stood up; walking around the room with his hands into the pockets of his pants, he was deep in thought.
Part of his mind was still looking for a way out, while the rest of it tried to digest what Vala had said about her childhood. It was the first time that he ever heard her talking about her childhood that openly; with a feel of longing. Even when Jacek had come to SGC, she had been distant, unwilling to share any thing about her past, among her home world. He certainly hadn’t expect to find any flowers and kittens in her past because of obvious reasons, so he let her, waiting her open up to him in her own terms. He knew she cared but then again, you could never be sure how she would react. However, it was nice to hear from her own mouth that she had not always in this way.
He kept pacing, thoughts circling in his mind, occasionally telling to Vala to keep her eyes open. "If you want me to stay awake," she complained after the fourth or fifth time, "you're going to have to talk to me. I know you’ve been thinking about our infamous escape plan. You’ve gotta have something by now."
He laughed humorlessly. "Yeah, I've been working on it, but I still can't think of a good one." Daniel shook his head, staring up the walls.
"You know," she said absently, "The next time when I get stuck somewhere, I wish I would have that guy looks like Jack beside me. Not that you're an awful company, but--" She grinned miserably at him.
"MacGyver," he agreed. "Yeah, he should help."
“I remember one of the episodes; he managed to escape from a situation exactly like this.” She said shivering suddenly, pulling Daniel's attention abruptly back to her. "Vala?"
"It's getting a little chilly, isn’t it? I'm fine." She faked a smile, badly.
It was indeed getting colder. That was the thing that he hated the most desert nights, one moment you were under the sun sweating like a pig and the next moment, the sun was down and you found yourself shivering all of sudden. He looked at the little opening above them; saw the setting sun, coloring everything in a magical gold. He thought for a second, then gave in, took off his BDU and sat back down beside her, putting his arm under her shoulders and levering her a little upright.
"Thought I wasn't supposed to sit up?" She asked, giving him another look.
"Change of plans." He settled her carefully, leaning the uninjured side of her head against his shoulder, and spreading his BDU over both of them as well as he could.
"Warn me if your stomach starts getting upset, or your head starts hurting. 'Kay?" he added.
"Okay.” A pause and then. “So Daniel, do you always use trapped, concussed women to get a date? You could have always asked, darling." She faked a purr, settling against him.
"Not really." He grabbed her wrist and pushed her arm down against his stomach, wrapping his other arm awkwardly around her shoulders. "It's about staying warm, not a come-on." He added firmly.
"Sure it is." She laughed back. He grimaced.
They sat in silence again, her breath warm against his shirt. "The teams, they should have come by now, if they were not in the same condition like us, shouldn’t they?" She asked after a while.
He dropped his head. "Yeah, probably. Even if they’re okay, there is still a possibility that they don’t have their equipment with them. They might have be harmed during the earthquake.” He shook his head. "But the local people might be looking for us right now." He looked the watch on his wrist, forgetting it was broken.
"We'll be out of here soon, promise. I'm working on it." He let out a deep breath. Not working fast enough, or well enough, or else they'd be out of here by now, but he was working on it. Unfortunately, this consisted mostly of sitting around on his ass while Vala got cold and her head was probably getting worse.
"What?" Vala asked as she realized his muscles were all tightened.
He shook his head, trying to force himself to relax. "Nothing. I might... Nothing. Hey, eyes open!” He said, shaking her a little as he saw that she was about to sleep again. “No sleeping. All the way back. Good.” He said approvingly as she kept them open.
"Ahh, Daniel, you're insufferable." She mumbled. “I'm sure you drove me nuts on that ship those fifty years.” She said, shaking her head slightly, clearing her mind.
“Or more nuts, whatever.”
“No,” He said flatly. ”We were happy.” She looked at him strangely, but said nothing.
“How are you feeling now?” He asked after a while.
“Hot.” She winked at him.
He probably could have let her go then, but the whole platonic cuddling thing was surprisingly pleasant. Not that he would admit this to her, but still...
"How do you know?" Vala asked abruptly.
"Hmm?" He blinked at her.
She blinked back at him. "You said, before. That we were happy on the ship. You were not guessing there. I know that tone. How can you be sure?"
"Oh." He blinked once again. Where had that come from? "Because, well. Why not. We're getting along so well lately."
“You always say that I'm a pain in the ass." She pointed out.
He shrugged. "Not exactly, you became my pain in my ass."
"Oh." She got quiet a minute. Then, "Great." She grinned. And neither of them said anything for a while.
She seemed to be drifting off again, so Daniel shook her slightly. "Hey. Stay with me, here."
"Sorry." She forced her eyes open, her voice slurring a little more than before. "It's just... I'm warmer now. And my head still hurts." Her hands went to her head, touching her forehead. Her fingers were caught the loosen hair clip between her hair. She got still for a long minute. “My hair clip.” She murmured.
“What?”
“My hair clip.”
“What's wrong with it?” He asked and narrowed his eyes at the hair clip in question. ”You feeling ok, right?”
She laughed slightly. “Yes silly, I'm fine.”
He lifted his brows.
“My hair clip. I could have used it to open the door if there was any.” She said, sighing deeply.
“Can you?”
“Well, it’s not like one of my preferred tools but yes.” She then narrowed her eyes. “Why, do you happen to know any locked doors around here?”
“Do you remember the little door we saw at the back of the temple?” He stood up abruptly, making Vala fall on the floor as she puffed. “I can’t believe that I forgot that one.” He slapped his hand over on his forehead. Then he leaned over her, helping her to lean up against the wall. “You’re a genius.” He said, brushing a light kiss over her cheek. “And whenever I say otherwise, just slap me.” He wrapped his BDU over her tightly. “I’m gonna check that door. It has to be at the end of tunnel, but towards the left side.” He looked at her carefully, placing his hands over her knees. “Promise me, you won’t close your eyes. No sleeping.”
“Daniel, don’t go—“
“If it felt down too, it would be waste of time going there. You’re in no shape---“ She tried to interrupt him but he shook his head. “No. Don’t argue with me. I’ll back soon. Just promise me, there will be no closing eyes.”
“Ok. Promise.” She nodded, looking unhappy. “I’ll sing. Come back soon.”
Running along the dusty corridors, he found it after twenty minutes, at the end of a narrow passage. It was a thick wooden door, locked and chained. He took its handle in his hand, pulling it to himself madly as his adrenalin ran high in his system, then he began to throw himself over against it, over and over again. But it was useless; he couldn’t even remove it in its frame. Standing, as dust and sweat ran down his shirt, he realized that he couldn’t open it alone. He needed help.
He began to run over to where he had left Vala alone. He found her, her back against the wall, her head rested slightly on the wall, eyes slightly open, singing Bitch by Meredith Brooks quitely.
I'm a bitch, I'm a
lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your health, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way
He stood at the center of the tunnel, remembering the first time she had sung that particular song. She had been singing it at the top of her lungs, screaming along the singer as he had tried to do his translation. After, when he had gone over and lowered the loudspeakers of his computer with an exaggerated sigh of annoyance, she had pouted and thrown him a deadly glance as he shooed her away from his office. He would have never guessed that hearing this song again would have made him this happy.
“Hey,” He said with a gentle smile on his face, tilting his head. “Nice song.”
She shrugged and then narrowed her eyes. “You look awful.” She said, looking at his now damaged t-shirt and dusty face. Now he shrugged.
“I tried to open it alone.”
“So there is a door. I could’ve gone with you.”
“We didn’t know that before.” He said coolly, coming in front of her. “Are you sure that you can do that?”
“I pick up lock, Daniel.” She wrinkled her nose, tilting her head.
“Yeah, right. It’ll be quite different this time.”
She gave him a look. “It won’t be the first time I picked a lock in bad shape.” She said absently.
“Right.” He said, nodding.
“But at first you've got to help me get up.” She said, taking the clip off. Daniel put his arms under her shoulders, and raised her up. “We need light too.” She said, looking at him. He nodded.
“Got it.” He said, fishing his flashlight out his pockets. He supported her, her arms around his neck, and Daniel thought that even if they made it till the back door and had she opened the lock, getting her to village would be a hell of problem, but he shook his head; it was a bridge that they’d cross when they’d get to it.
“Hey, tell me if your head feels bad or your stomach gets upset, ok?”
She nodded again and Daniel shifted her to his side, wrapping one of her arms around his belly, the other around his shoulder as they started to pace slowly to the door. “When we returned home, you’ve gotta show me that trick of yours.” Daniel said after a while as they made their way along the deserted tunnel, grunting under his breath.
“Oh my. Daniel, you want to learn pick up locks?”
“Well, it’s useful.”
She giggled a little. “I think I’m rubbing off on you in a bad way.”
“Don’t flatter yourself.” He grinned at her.
“I think we should thank to the street thief who had taught me to pick locks. The first time I picked one, I was given a sort of paper clip. After a while, when I finally got the damn lock open, I was all grinning like a silly cow but he just shook his head.” She said, shaking her head at her own memories. “He always gave me the paper clip, saying to feel for each of the pins, to lift each one of them, one by one.” She slipped slightly from his grasp. “One day I asked him why he hadn't given me any actual tool; he just shook his head and told me that I needed to learn it the hard way before being allowed to it the easy way. He was a con, a thief, but a wise one.” He smiled a little, pulling her against him.
When they finally came to the door, Daniel was praying thanks to any possible God out there that she had made it through their little walk without tripping over something and was okay; at the same time, she was panting and shaking on her feet violently.
“Hey, you ok?”
She rested her head on his shoulder as her back rested against the door. “Uh…uh…just give me a couple of minutes.” She panted as he threw a suspicious look at her.
“Hey, eyes open.”
“Cazzanta! Yes, open.” She hissed and straighten up, turning over the door. Daniel lit the flashlight and its light lit the darkening tunnel, playing with their shadows. She picked the lock and observed it. It was a simple one that she would be able to pick easily in other circumstances. Under the dim light of Daniel’s flashlight, it was barely visible but Vala put her fingers on it, caressing it, her eyes closed. She open them and narrowing them, tried to focus, smiling at Daniel reassuringly, before he snapped at her another 'open your eyes' command. His arm was still supporting her around her belly, holding her tightly from behind. They were blurs before her eyes but she shook her head and put the flat piece of clip in as she went through all the things the con artist had said in her mind. Feel around for each pin. She twisted it around until she felt for one of those moments of rightness, but to no avail. She sighed, relaxed her fingers a little but her head was turning and making her dizzy, as her stomach was doing funny things. She stilled herself until she relaxed and tried once again. Twisting, lifting it over and over again till that moment of rightness.
click…
To be continued…
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