Night and Day
By: AngelQueen
CATEGORY: Friendship
SEASON/SPOILERS: Vague spoilers for Season 10 and the movies
WARNINGS: Off-screen character death
AUTHOR’S NOTES: For the Samantha Carter mini ficathon at sg_femslash. Many thanks to havocthecat for her excellent beta job. : )
AUTHOR’S WEBSITE:
http://angelqueen04.livejournal.com/
Eight weeks after Daniel died, Sam wished it would rain.
Rain until there was a huge flood, washing everything away, and leaving nothing
but destruction in its wake. God had supposedly done it before, when he had
Noah build his ark, so why not now? Surely it was only right that someone care, react, anything, to
Daniel’s death.
The Ori were dead, Adria was dead, and now their army had been defeated. They
should all be celebrating now, but they weren’t. At least, no one from the SGC
was. The price for victory had been far too high. Daniel was dead, having
sacrificed himself to destroy the Priors’ link to the power harnessed by the
Ori. He was gone, and they all knew that this time, there was no coming back.
Death had finally sunk its teeth into him, and it had no intention of letting
go.
Sam had lost track of how long she’d been here, lying in her bed. Was it days?
Weeks? Months? Was it morning,
She hadn’t been left in complete solitude by any means. Teal’c had visited her,
and
Vala had come in too, but unlike the men, she had been silent. Sam’s conscience
had reminded her that Vala was also suffering. She had trusted Daniel and let
him close to her when she kept the rest of them at arm’s length. Still, neither
of them had said a word to each other, and eventually, the former thief left
the room, shutting the door quietly behind her.
Sometimes, Sam dreamed. Sometimes, she saw people long dead, like her parents,
Martouf, or Janet. Sometimes even Daniel was with them, his arm wrapped loosely
around the waist of a woman she recognized from pictures as Sha’re. He looked
younger and happier than she’d ever seen him.
Wishful thinking, she knew. Sam was a scientist. The idea of there actually
being a heaven of some kind didn’t hold true to that. All that mattered in the
end was that Daniel, a great man, a wonderful friend who had sacrificed more
than anyone should ever have had to, was dead and gone for good.
At that moment, Sam heard the door to her room open. She took it as meaning
that the rest of the team had arrived for their daily visit. She wondered if
everyone was here. General O’Neill had gone back to
“Sam, get up.”
Vala? Vala was never the first to come into her room. More often than not, she
was one of the last, as though she had been sent by the men as a last resort.
“Sam, enough of this. Get up.”
Enough? Enough—
Vala had apparently decided to use methods a little more forceful, because Sam
suddenly found her warm little cocoon of blankets pulled from her body,
exposing her bare legs and arms to the cool, air-conditioned air. She groaned
and reached out, grasping the edge of the blankets again and yanking them back
over her. There, much better.
She heard Vala sigh and leave, though she did not hear the door snap shut. She
didn’t care. She’d close it later, when she gathered enough energy to go to the
bathroom. Sam knew that Vala was probably only trying to help, in her own
flamboyant way, but right now, Sam didn’t want help. She just wanted to be able
to lie where she was and mourn what she had lost.
While lying there, Sam could faintly hear voices outside her room. One had the
sultry, velvet tones—Vala—while the other was male, and sounded unsure.
“Vala, that might not be the best—”
“We’ve tried everything else.”
“Indeed. Stand aside, Colonel Mitchell.” That was definitely Teal’c.
Silence fell again, and Sam dismissed what she had heard. She didn’t want to
think about what was going on outside the room right—
The ice-cold water came out of nowhere, and her blankets offered her no
protection. She shrieked and bolted out of bed, looking around wildly. There,
to her left, stood Vala. She was holding an empty bucket that Sam usually used
when she mopped her floors.
Sam blinked rapidly, her synapses firing as she struggled to comprehend just
what had happened. “What—”
“There,” Vala interrupted, “now you have an excuse to get up. I dare say that
bed will not be habitable for a good while.”
Sam narrowed her eyes. “Vala, what do you think you’re doing?”
“Forcing you to look beyond the cave of your own despair, Samantha. I do
believe you have wallowed in it for quite long enough.” Vala’s expression grew
just as heated as Sam’s tone had been. “You are not the only one grieving. We
loved Daniel too. General O’Neill is in just as much pain as you are, and now
he’s been forced to watch you slip further and further away. Enough with this
selfishness.”
Sam glared at the other woman, and then at the men standing in the doorway.
“You two actually let her do that?” she demanded.
Cameron had the grace to look a little apologetic, but he still just shrugged.
Teal’c only stared at her with his normal inexpressive gaze, saying nothing.
“Colonel, Teal’c,” Vala said. “I think Samantha and I need some time alone.”
Her words were clearly enough for Cameron, and he nearly stumbled in his haste
as he threw his goodbyes to Sam over his shoulder. Teal’c, of course, bowed his
head cordially enough, and followed the colonel out of the house. The two women
stood in silence, listening to the car outside starting and then driving off.
“Why are you still here?” Sam asked bitterly.
“Because,” Vala replied, dropping the bucket. She nudged Sam over to sit down
on the soaked bed and joined her a moment later. She raised one hand to cup
Sam’s chin, her other hand reaching for Sam’s hand and clasping it. Nothing
further was said.
Sam eventually left the bed again, and Vala kept her so busy afterward that she
didn’t have time to think about going into the other bedroom and crawling into
that bed.
* * * *
One year to the day after Daniel died, Sam had been assigned
to Atlantis. Doctor Weir was still on Earth recuperating from the injuries
she’d sustained, and was not yet up to returning to her duties full time, so
Sam had been given command of the city until she was.
The Gate was activated and Sam looked up. She’d been trying to distract herself
from the date by working the new data concerning ZPM construction in the
office—still couldn’t think of it as hers. Standing up, she walked across the
bridge and into the control room.
“We’re receiving Earth’s IDC, Colonel,” Sergeant Campbell reported.
Used to the man whose efficiency rivaled Walter Harriman’s, Sam only nodded.
“Open the shield.”
She looked down into the Gate room, watching as the event horizon rippled and a
familiar figure stepped through. Sam blinked, surprised, but then smiled a
little and moved to walk down the stairs.
“Vala!”
The other woman, clad in her black uniform and her hair in her customary
pigtails, grinned at her while shifting her small duffel bag—matching her
uniform, of course—from one shoulder to the other. “Hello, Samantha,” she said.
“I thought you were helping SG-18 with an old temple belonging to Qetesh.” The
unspoken ‘I thought you wouldn’t be here’ was still palpable.
Vala shook her head. “The world is in the last part of its wet season, which
makes it difficult to do very much. General Landry postponed the mission for a
week or two.” She smirked. “The boys were most disappointed.”
Sam rolled her eyes. “Come on,” she said. “I’m sure we have some guest quarters
available for you.”
* *
The hours passed and Sam was busy for most of it. Vala had
been to Atlantis only once before, and had been looked forward to a more
thorough sweep of the place. Sam showed her many things, such as the excellent
view of the city and ocean from all angles, and the deserted north pier which
was perfect for privacy. Sam even showed her several of the large bedrooms that
existed beyond the little alcoves that lay within the vicinity of the control
room. Some of them had not even been cleared yet, and there were still personal
articles that had remained there since the Ancients had abandoned Atlantis.
Vala looked like she was enjoying herself, but Sam thought she knew the
ex-thief well enough to see the faint look of pain behind her eyes. She didn’t
call her on it, because Sam understood what she was likely thinking.
Daniel had only been to Atlantis once. He had always wanted to come for a
thorough search of the city. Both women knew that many of the things they had
seen that day would have been appreciated far more by him than by them.
His loss still hurt Sam. She lived with that pain everyday, and she knew Vala
did too. She knew that was why Vala had come, to keep their shared pain at bay.
Vala had been the one to pull Sam out of the dust, and to force her to keep
walking. Now she was there to keep them both going on the day when their pain
was at its most raw.
That evening, Sam gathered up a few dishes and carried them out to the north
pier, where she and Vala ate their meal in solitude, away from the bustle of
the city.
“So,” she asked after a lengthy silence, “what are the boys up to?”
Vala tilted her head slightly as she struggled to cut her meat without spilling
her plate’s contents. “Cameron’s on leave, visiting his parents,” she said.
Smirking, she added, “I told him to tell his parents that I’d dumped him for
someone who I could actually have a bond and
sex with.”
Sam shook her head. “And Teal’c?”
“With Bra’tac, Ry’ac, and his daughter-in-law. Apparently, the young couple is
expecting their first child. Teal’c’s already bought the toy store out of baby
toys.”
Sam laughed and made a note to get Ry’ac and his wife a present for the baby.
Silence fell again, and while it wasn’t awkward, the specter of what the day
represented was clearly making its presence felt.
Eventually, Vala finished her meal and set the plate down. She scooted over to
Sam and draped her long legs and bare feet over the side, letting the waves
leap up and splash her when they crashed against the pier. She sat so close to
her that their thighs brushed up against one another every time either woman so
much as shifted. Sam found it a little odd, but not uncomfortable.
They sat together in silence for a while, having run out of things to say.
After the sun finally began to set, they picked up the remains of their meal
and moved back into the central area of the city. The hall consisting of the
guest quarters was deserted.
Sam reached out and touched Vala’s arm briefly. “Thanks, Vala.” She didn’t say
what for, but didn’t doubt that the other woman understood. She started to
remove her hand, but was halted when Vala reached out and caught it with her
own.
Sam watched, mesmerized, as Vala pulled her hand up to her cheek, molding it to
her skin. Vala then turned her head, letting her lips brush just a little over
her palm. The intimate touch was electric, spiking through Sam’s body.
“You’re welcome, Sam.”
* * * *
Two years after Daniel died, Sam and Vala visited his grave
together. Sam was pretty sure that Vala went there more often on her own, but
though they shared much these days, each still had things that remained private
and separate from each other. Sam didn’t begrudge Vala what solace she might
find here.
The marker was a simple one, with his name on it and the words ‘Treasured
Friend, You Will Be Missed’ engraved below it. There was a small pot filled
with lilies on its right. Vala had told her that someone replaced the old
flowers with fresh ones regularly.
The area of Daniel’s burial had been well-chosen. It was in a shaded area of
the large cemetery, just off to the left of a large tree. It was a cozy little
spot, and Sam even felt comfortable sitting down in the grass just in front of
the marker.
“Hey, Daniel,” she said softly, tracing the letters with her finger and
wondering at how she didn’t feel silly for talking to a grave. Sam remembered
very clearly feeling like an idiot when she had tried to do so at her mother’s
grave. Maybe it was because she was older now, or maybe it was because Vala had
seated herself behind her, resting her chin on Sam’s left shoulder and wrapping
her arms around Sam loosely. Sam glanced at her, confused, but Vala just
smiled.
“I’ve told Daniel all about us,” she said, her eyes sparkling. “I dare say he’s
very happy for us both.”
Sam blinked, but just smiled a little and shook her head. “Okay then.” She
turned back to the marker. “I guess you probably know everything I could tell
you about the others, if Vala comes here so often. Probably even more than I
know.” Sam laughed when Vala nudged her, but then schooled her face into a more
serious expression. “Seriously, Daniel, I miss you a lot, just as much as I did
two years ago, when… well, I was in a dark, dark place for a while. But Vala
pulled me out, just like you probably would have if things had been different.”
Vala tightened her arms, and Sam reached up to rub them with one hand and to
cup her cheek in the other. Recognizing the gesture, Vala turned her head and
kissed her palm. Staying like that, despite the awkward position, Sam turned
back.
“I wish I could think of more to say, Daniel,” she said. She stopped as she
felt her throat tightening up just a bit.
“It’s all right,” Vala said softly. “I think he knows. He had an annoying habit
of always knowing.”
Sam laughed away the instinct to cry. “I don’t think anyone will argue with
that.” She turned her head again and pushed Vala with her hand just enough so
that their lips would meet in a brief kiss.
Things were okay.
** The End **
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