Not an Archaeologist   

                                                                                                                                                By:  whytejigsaw   

 

 

CATEGORY:  General 

SEASON/SPOILERS:  Season 10

WARNINGS:  None

 

AUTHOR’S WEBSITE:

 

  http://whytejigsaw.livejournal.com/

 

 

Daniel looked up to see the familiar sight of Vala standing in his door way. She was as distractingly lovely as ever. He shook his head to dismiss those dangerous thoughts and raised an eyebrow in a reasonable impression of Teal’c’s trademark move.

 

“Daniel. I’ve been doing some research. That internet is a marvellous resource.”

 

“You do realise that a lot of what is on the internet is, at best, unverified, and in some cases completely untrue?”

 

“Never mind that now, darling. I’ve been reading about archaeology and I’m not entirely sure you are an archaeologist at all!”

 

“Huh? What?” blustered Daniel. He mumbled and gestured at the framed degrees on the wall, all from prestigious universities in both Europe and the US. “I have multiple degrees and 2 PhDs.”

 

Vala nodded, holding up her hand to halt further debate. 

 

“That may well be the case but certain things cannot be denied.  Number 1: Archaeologists participate in excavations (she made cute little quote marks with her fingers), or in Earth parlance “a dig”. Now having read your file, you haven’t been on a dig in about 6 years and prior to that, about 5 more.”

 

“I’ve been on lots of digs. Granted – not that many since I joined the SGC but…”

 

“And how long have you worked for the SGC, Daniel?”

 

“10 years.”

 

“Yes, so that closes the case for number 1. Now, number 2: archaeologists publish papers. Dr Daniel Jackson last published a paper 12 years ago based on the frankly preposterous notion that the pyramids were landing platforms for alien space ships.” Her eyes twinkled. “Ok, so you were right there but no one believed you.”

 

Daniel grimaced. Obviously, that one still annoyed him. He opened his mouth to interject but again Vala shut him up.

 

“Wait! I’m not done. Number 3: as archaeology is seasonal work, archaeologists supplement their income by giving lectures to college students. You don’t do that either.”

 

“Vala, this is ridiculous. Of course I’m an archaeologist. Now go away, I’m working on something important.” 

 

Vala did not leave. Instead, she walked around the room picking up random artefacts and putting them back down again.

 

“I do have one final definitive point, Daniel,” she said at last. 

 

Daniel resigned himself to listening to her and folded his arms across his chest. A defensive position, Vala noted with amusement.

 

“I looked at pictures of archaeologists on the internet. As a profession, they are all terribly old and unattractive. I mean, we are talking about some seriously ugly people here. Sun-damaged skin and interesting sartorial choices abound! In fact, there was only one attractive archaeologist, a Dr Indiana Jones…”

 

Daniel smiled, “He’s not actually real.”

 

“Yes, I looked into him in great detail. And so, there you have it. You can’t possibly be an archaeologist!”

 

“I don’t understand. What’s your point?” Daniel looked confused.

 

“My point, dear Daniel, is that since you have taken part in no digs this millennium, neither publish papers nor lecture and are one of the most attractive men on this planet, you can’t possibly be an archaeologist. I’ve decided that you are in fact a historian and a linguist. And a damn sexy one! But since there are no sexy archaeologists…

 

“I can’t possibly be one. I get it now. So on one hand, you’re trashing my life’s work because it has not followed the conventional path but on the other, you really think I’m sexy?” he trailed off with a dismissive wave of his hand and looked away, embarrassed.

 

“Yes, Daniel, and apparently clueless,” said Vala, walking up behind him so when he turned, she was right in front of him. She looked him straight in the eyes, stood on her tippy toes and planted a warm kiss on his lips. His arms began to pull her close but she wriggled out of grasp.

 

“So, tell me how I can meet this Harrison Ford?”

 

Daniel replied softly, “No idea. I’m a historian who has spent the last 10 years advising the military, remember?” He smiled, then leaned down to kiss her again. Vala decided to let him.

 

 

                                                                                   ** The End **   

 

 

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