The Hardest Part
By: sorrel_rowan
CATEGORY: Missing Scene
SEASON/SPOILERS: Season 10 “Dominion”
WARNINGS: None
AUTHOR’S NOTES: Dedicated to Anjirika and Padfoot001, I hope this makes you happy.
AUTHOR’S WEBSITE:
http://www.fanfiction.net/~sorrelrowan
1. Window of
“We heard Adria had
come back through the super gate…”
“You allowed me to be
exposed to radiation for your plan!”
“Your plan, actually.”
“What’s going on?” Vala asked, coming into the briefing room and sitting down next to Daniel on the left-hand side.
Before anyone had a chance to answer, Colonel Reynolds and
General Landry came out of his office. Sam and
“Colonel Reynolds and SG-3 were doing reconnaissance on PX2-913,” Landry began without preamble and with a significant look at Vala, “And apparently the Ori foot-soldiers are celebrating the return of their ‘blessed leader.’”
Vala looked between Reynolds and Landry, voice subdued. “Adria?”
Reynolds nodded almost apologetically. “They described her too well for it to be anyone else.”
Vala nodded and swallowed.
“Maybe…” Everyone’s eyes turned to Daniel, “If the Ori are dead – maybe we can convince her to leave?”
After a moment of deep silence,
“Possibly,” the general replied, “But how do we get her?”
“Me,” Vala said simply. “Use me as bait.”
“No offence,”
“So we use that memory-implanting, retrieving thing,” Vala
said, waving her hands at
“We could leak word of you being out in the galaxy alone again,” Sam put in thoughtfully, “Minimise the potential for things to go wrong by helping Adria to find you.”
“I can take care of that, sir,” Reynolds added, “We could let it slip on ‘913, it shouldn’t take long for it to get through the priors to Adria.”
“It would have to be a very good story,” Daniel said quietly. “It has to convince Vala as well as Adria.”
Vala grinned and nodded, “I am rather brilliant, aren’t I?”
“If you can make this work, I have no objections,” Landry broke in, thinking he should make an opportune escape.
“I don’t know if I’d go that far,” Daniel said hurriedly as they stood up, following her to his office. His office, he reminded himself, racing to keep up.
* * * *
Sam walked in with three cps of coffee on a tray and sat down at the desk with Daniel and Vala.
“So how’s the writing going?”
“Hardly Nobel-winning standard,” Vala said pointedly, with a significant look at Daniel.
“Don’t you mean Pulitzer?”
“No, Daniel,” Vala said smugly, “They have a Nobel prize for literature, too.”
“Oh.”
“What’s wrong?” Sam asked, handing Vala her coffee.
“Thanks,” Vala replied, “And he’s not being mean enough.”
“Is that right?” Sam said with a raised eyebrow, looking at Daniel in her best Teal’c impression. “How so?”
“Well, he won’t put in things that could really hurt my feelings, since I’m such a sensitive soul and all,” Vala said with a glare, “Which is the only way it’s going to be convincing in my head to leave here.”
“Yes, but we don’t want you to get shot when you and Adria walk into our ambush, so it can’t be too terrible,” Daniel retorted.
“So we make you all very apologetic and the IOA do the worst of it. Betrayal by silence,” Vala said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “We all can’t stand them anyway, and after what they did to you and Teal’c it’d make sense.”
“Didn’t think of that,” Daniel replied.
“Didn’t think you did,” Vala responded, pushing his glasses back up his nose as Sam turned a laugh in a cough under Daniel’s glare.
After Sam left, they went back to fabricating Vala’s memories.
“So what would be the first thing you did after escaping here?” Daniel asked.
“I would go to Teranelsh – PK5 916 – and retrieve some clothes and credits from the store I didn’t tell you about,” Vala replied with an impish grin.
Daniel fixed a glare on her grey eyes.
“There was no need, Daniel,” She held up her hands, “It’s only some clothes and enough for a room and food.”
He rolled his eyes, “And then what?”
“I’d get very drunk,” She replied seriously, “At the bar on that little planet. It’s a lovely place, great food, great alcohol – strong enough to get me drunk so I’m never taking you there-”
“Vala-”
She held up a hand. “-And four or five scoundrels from whom I can cheat a cargo ship.”
He smiled and nodded.
“But I would only do that on the second night, when I knew who was playing and had thoroughly drowned my sorrows,” Vala said almost clinically. “Can we give me memories of being very drunk and sleeping in the forest? I don’t really want to suffer that hangover.”
“Fair enough,” Daniel acknowledged, “We can give you a sedative to make it feel like a little bit of hangover.”
It was getting late, and they were finally at the fine-tuning stage. “What?” Daniel asked. “We can finish this tomorrow, if you want. One day isn’t going to finish off the universe.”
“I want to do this quickly,” Vala admitted, “The less time I have to think about it and all the things that could go wrong – most of them thanks to my unpredictable self – the easier it’ll be. And the sooner I go, the sooner I come back.” She smiled thoughtfully when he didn’t reply. “See, now I’m worried,” Vala said from her position lying on top of the desk, which he strangely hadn’t said a word about either. “Because usually that’s exactly what you say about…” She yawned. “Everything from the Sangraal to the dusty rocks the rest of us almost trip over.” He swatted at her as she dodged and rolled off the table. He shook his head with a smile as she tossed her hair with a triumphant grin.
“Daniel?” She asked, more quietly than normal. “Is this a bad idea?”
Daniel took a breath and looked at her. “No,” He said, meeting her eyes, “It’s a good plan.”
“So why are you-”
“Because I think too much.”
Daniel couldn’t meet her eyes, but hoped somehow that she understood. He felt two cool fingers beneath his chin drawing his eyes to hers.
“You’re worried I won’t come back,” She said calmly, eyes on his, “Or that I won’t want to.”
He nodded and met her eyes again.
“Trust me,” She said simply, mouth twisting into an ironic grin, “Even when I won’t trust you.”
Daniel nodded and ducked his head with a smile as she jumped off of the table and walked to the door. She stopped and looked back at him with a smile, stepping to the opposite side of the desk.
“Daniel?”
“Yes?”
“Me too.”
Daniel looked at her and nodded after a long moment. “How should I-?”
“I’ll probably be an idiot about it,” Vala said with the same ironic grin. “And you’ll probably have to shout at me. But- I do, okay? No matter what I say.”
“You won’t remember this,” Daniel said quietly.
“You will,” Vala said brightly, “And if I don’t come back, I told you anyway.”
Daniel reached up a hand to cup her cheek. “You know, now would normally be the time…” He trailed off.
She grinned impishly and put a finger on his lips. “That we’re both remembering.”
He grinned a little sheepishly and kissed her forehead. Vala put a hand on his cheek and smiled before turning and walking out of the office.
2. Delirium
She took a deep breath and sat down on the chair with an
impish smile that didn’t quite mask how nervous she was. When she turned wide
eyes on the orderlies roughly putting vital monitors on her temple and an IV in
her wrist, Sam stepped up and took over. Vala calmed slightly as Daniel,
Daniel stepped up to the chair and put a hand over hers as the sedative began to take effect.
“I’ll see you later?” She asked drowsily.
“I might even shout,” Daniel replied as her eyes closed.
3. A Hesitation
"We escorted you
to the planet where we found you and dropped you off."
"Slept through it like a baby."
The beaming technology dropped them off in the clearing Vala
had suggested on the planetary map a few days before. Sam and Daniel knelt on
either side of Vala as Sam quickly checked her vitals as
Standing and picking up the stretcher, Sam brushed Vala’s
hair from her eyes and swallowed, then looked at
“We’d better being going before the princess wakes up,”
Daniel nodded, irrationally holding a hand out palm facing upwards as he felt the first light drops of rain cool against his skin and thinking that they couldn’t leave now. It was raining. Eyes bright, he looked at Teal’c, who somehow understood and bent to pick up Vala and place her beneath the shelter of the nearest tree.
As she mumbled and shifted, curling into the hollow at the base of the tree and shaking her head from side to side, Daniel felt a light touch on his wrist that brought him to his senses and met blue eyes. He hadn’t realised he’d automatically started towards Vala.
Ten minutes later, having checked in their weapons and vests, they arrived on the bridge. Colonel Davidson gave them a guarded look and signalled the technician. The screen on the right flickered into life to display the camera feed as Vala stirred, shifting from side to side and toppling onto the forest floor. Sitting up slowly, she put a hand to her head and blinked forcefully. Looking around, eyes wide with mild panic, Daniel ducked his head and looked away when she put her hand to her thigh and then her chest where her radio would have been.
They heard her slightly ragged breath as the implanted memories caught up and Vala remembered why she was sleeping in a forest on another planet.
She sat up and they saw her put a hand to her head. “Oh, no. Too much alcohol.”
Standing and looking around, she put a steadying hand on the nearest tree. “Not enough alcohol.”
She took a deep breath and emptied out the contents of the satchel she had put together before the memory implantation. After counting what looked to be credits and palming something suspiciously similar to cards up her sleeve, she pulled out the last item in the pack.
“She didn’t tell us she was putting that in,”
“We would have asked her why,” Sam said with a light smile.
“And I don’t think she could have explained it,” Daniel finished.
“Should we not retrieve it for her return?” Teal’c asked quietly.
“Probably,”
4. Old Habits
“How’s Vala?”
“Pissed.”
“Does someone want to
fill her in?”
“Oh someone. Just not us.”
"Okay, that wasn't part of the plan," Daniel said as the jaffa beamed out, taking Adria with them.
“Didn’t I say something about not speaking to me ever again?” Vala said sharply.
“Oh, so I can’t speak at all?” Daniel shot back without thinking.
“Although that would be a pleasant change, just not to me,” Vala retorted.
“Well I wasn’t,” Daniel said, hearing the words come out of his mouth and knowing exactly how immature they sounded, “I was speaking to the general area.”
“Well I’m sure the general area isn’t any more interested than I am, so please do be a darling and-” She stopped, looking at the amused faces of the rest of SG-1 and the assembled teams. “Oh and don’t any of you, not one of you-” She broke off and strode to the DHD and began to punch in an address.
“Somewhere,” Vala said intently, dialling with the other hand, “That you people aren’t.”
That other hand was suddenly unavailable when Teal’c put both hands on her upper arms and moved her away from the DHD forcibly.
Vala’s voice became curiously high-pitched in places. “Get your hands off of me! You have no right to even think about dragging me back to that-”
Teal’c deposited her in front of Daniel and Sam, who exchanged glances and sighs.
“Vala!” Daniel shouted over her, struggling to remember that she was actually – in her mind – justified entirely in lashing out. She brought out the angry little child in him that way.
Speaking of angry little children… Daniel thought as she kicked Teal’c on the shin hard enough for them to hear it. To his credit, Teal’c’s expression barely changed.
She stepped away from him and in front of Daniel, meeting his eyes squarely, her own conflicted with a heady mix of emotions and her voice throbbing. “You get the next two sentences and I am leaving.”
“Trust me?” Daniel said quietly. “Trust us?”
When she swallowed and looked away, Daniel put a hand above her elbow and hoped she didn’t slap him as well.
“There’s too much to tell you here,” He said quietly, “But come back with us. If you’re not convinced, you can leave.”
“You promise that?” She asked, meeting his eyes again. He
nodded, letting out a long breath when she nodded cautiously as
“False gods help you if I end up in Area 51, Daniel,” Vala hissed as they started on the steps to the gate, “Because trust me when I say there won’t be distance far enough to run.”
“You gave me two sentences,” Daniel muttered in reply, letting amused relief into his voice and putting a hand on the small of her back, “You’re still here.”
She shot him a glare with a hint of an unwilling smile, “Well, that’s totally beside the point.”
“Of course it is,” Daniel smiled and nodded as they stepped through the gate to the SGC.
5. Proximity
“I find it hard to believe you don’t feel something.”
They were in his office with coffee again. They’d left the briefing room after updating Landry on the specifics of the events on the Odyssey and Daniel had noticed she’d followed him seemingly on autopilot to his office, turning off at the mess and walking in with two cups of coffee without a word ten minutes later. He wondered idly where she’d sit, knowing by now that it said more than words or tears, and had his suspicions confirmed when she pulled a stool around to his side of the desk and sat close by him.
He wasn’t sure when it’d stopped bothering him, to have her so close by him, or when he’d started responding in kind, but it was a fact of their daily lives now. It had become more pronounced after his time as a prior; that much he knew. Her simple act of sitting on his lap and sitting by his side rather than opposing him – as even Jack had felt compelled to – had been an anchor he’d needed.
Vala had never been one for books, so she couldn’t pretend in her mind that the dusty tomes were what brought her to his office. The artefacts stood a better chance – she had once made a living stealing things like them. But what brought her was more the atmosphere. After her return to Earth from the Ori galaxy, she’d brought a book and read it in the corner, swapping between pestering Daniel on the credibility of the Da Vinci Code and ignoring him unintentionally after discovering Virginia Woolf.
She wasn’t sure when it stopped bothering him – or when she’d stopped trying to bother him – but she noticed it was a pattern they both fell into now. If one walked into a room, they’d most likely stand by the other. In briefings, the rest of the team tended to leave the chair by them empty for the other. When she’d walked into the infirmary on the Odyssey, mentally preparing herself to watch Adria die, no one had questioned his right to be there with her.
Then again, it had been in her eyes, Daniel thought, not
paying attention to the translation in front of him any more than she was
reading The Devil Wears Prada.
“I was an incubator, a
shipping crate.”
“I’d like to be there.”
Adria was not her child, Vala repeated in her mind again. But that didn’t cover it.
“Daniel?”
He set aside the translation he was pretending to be working on to meet her eyes next to his.
“It’s difficult to explain,” Vala said softly, “She saw me as her mother regardless of what I said. She treated me as though we were connected. It made it harder to believe we weren’t.”
Daniel nodded and passed her the coffee she’d brought in but left untouched, knowing that was as far as Vala could explain the tenuous connection between Adria and herself.
“When I walked out,” Vala continued, needing to bleed it off suddenly, “It was about more than seeing Adria like that.”
Daniel didn’t mention her tacit admission that it had been partly to do with Adria.
“Either way, it must
be difficult to see her treated this way.”
“The extraction process?” He asked.
She nodded in an almost childlike way, looking into the distance. “My time as a host is mercifully vague. I remember waking up in a tok’ra safe house in control of my body and I’ve always been content not to know how I got there. I didn’t want to see it in front of me in all the gruesome details. Especially since the tok'ra who extracted Katesh had none of your fancy equipment and I was lucky to survive it as barely as I did.”
He nodded again as silence fell between them, turning back to his translation when she turned back to her book and he saw the pages actually turning, knowing she would continue to surprise him by bleeding off the memories and the pain slowly and interspersing it with questions about Vogue magazine or Earth history.
Somehow, as unconnected as they were, his time as a prior and her recent memory episode with its subsequent adventures, they had created a link between them. Maybe the simple fact of it being two ordeals and the other one being there, but it was enough. It was a strange, disjointed parallel that shouldn't fit but as far as Daniel was concerned, that described everything that ran between them. There wasn't one simple thread running from one to the other that could be cut but thousands of thin wires connecting her love of Mexican salsa to his of tacos, her Cosmo phase to his guilty indulgence in Strange Tales from Around the World, their shared joy in history and finding things (however she tried to hide it when it didn't sparkle) and their quietly shared pains. She was simply too embedded in his daily life to be cut out.
Vala found herself able to concentrate on the rather average book again, having said what had filled her mind to capacity and emptied that pressure valve. As it stood, when it was filled again to beyond her ability to contain, she knew somehow – after both their crucibles – that when it happened again, he wouldn’t mind if she were standing near him.
** The End **
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